Musing

[written at the internet café, Kihei, Maui – published about the time I am changing planes in Vancouver en route back to Calgary]

I’ve enjoyed responses, calls and feeling of ‘having many of you along’ these last two weeks; I know some of you enjoyed the travel-log, weather reports ( mostly sunny in Maui today, isolated showers, high 77-82F, chance of rain 20%; some the photos (one more today . .scroll down to see my last view from the lanai . . looking homeward), some the words too – it was a pleasure taking you along; my walk this morning . . in the Vancouver airport terminal will be hustle shuffle time; by the time this is read by musers I will have cleared customs, loaded my bags (and me) on a flight to Calgary whereby all we will arrive together about 10AM Calgary time; weather in Calgary – predicted to be –1C/30F, chance of flurries . . oh boy!

I will resume life with Gusta, work and play in Calgary, daily trips to they gym (need to work on that rotator cuff before golf season begins) . . . or at least before my next trip to Maui!

in a few days my tan will have swirled down the drain so that by the time spring arrives I will look just as pale as everyone else; but . . I will have broken the back of winter; daily routine, with or without a longing to get away someplace warm is OK; as much as I enjoyed the holiday, I am looking forward to being back - back to work, back home, back to ‘normal’

whatever these next few weeks hold, it will be a short sprint till it is time to wear shorts again; my TODAY will be filled with some urgent work, picking up Gusta and taking my dad out for an errand as well as ‘catching up’ with him . . . I have some other catching up to do too . . .

a slower pace, a work-year that starts Feb. 1, some very special projects I hope to work on, planning another trip . . .

planning a trip is not about the planning or the trip; it is about a change of pace, a change of scenery . . . and . . . once in a while, changing your life

go ahead, go away somewhere . . . even if you stay home

chance of flurries

stay warm

Aloha

Mark Kolke
337,348
203.8

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

Maui weather today: strong winds and high surf overnight and early this morning; mostly sunny with isolated showers, breezy, 76-81F, chance of rain 20%; tonight at 10PM Maui time (1AM Calgary time) I fly ‘home’ to Calgary via Vancouver

To Wanda at Wildflowers: many thanks, you’ve been doing a great job for me

beach walkers on any given day are probably 5% folks going home that day - just savoring the experience one last time, leaving a last set of footprints in the sand; today I think the other 95% stayed inside; wind and surf are pummeling other shores and other islands more than this one, but this is sufficiently dramatic for me to get the point of it all; this morning’s photo (scroll down) shows my 'regular' beach on the homeward leg, shot just after a wave receded; there is usually about 120-150 ft. of sand exposed then ... so you can imagine how high the water was as I was walking southbound at 5:45AM in the dark . . yikes! . . instead of having occasional waves wash my ankles, every second one was between knees and waist; awesome sight by starlight

BB, KN and others can take heart – this beach is not gone, just reshaped and I am sure the surf will re-deposit what it has withdrawn; palm fronds and associated debris littered paths, hotel staff need not pull their little harrows across the beach for a while as ‘beach front’ property takes on new dimensions (pretty good pun eh!)

who am I?

what do I think?

what do I feel?

what do I want?

what is on my mind?

the answers are here - among the footprints, laid down over and over, washed away only to be replaced by new ones, better ones, fresher ones, deeper ones – then washed away again, then new ones laid down in their place – answers are not in concrete so if you don’t like the ones you get, pour water on them and try again and again until you get it just right

we all ask these questions – frequency varies, depth of answers and/or avoidance of answers varies, our audience varies

when we answer these questions, to someone who asks, or just ‘to the air’ when someone just happens to be in the room, I think most people – me too – tend to posture our answers, be less fulsome in what we say, often being superficial in our honesty so that we obscure the scary stuff that is down deep – not dishonest, just not laid-bare the way we need to if we are going to accomplish something meaningful

I find I can do that alone on a beach, staring at a wave, waving at a cloud going by; when I have solitude I am solitary but not alone; we are together with ourselves . . just the two of us with no one else watching, no one listening in

if you cannot get some time to be ‘alone with myself’, then I recommend a solitary vacation somewhere; it could be Maui or post-hole Sask, it could be on a beach, on a mountainside or in the middle of a crowd somewhere – but it will be away somewhere

just you, you and yourself, just the two of you

this place, Maui, is one of those places where you can get down to the very root of everything – it is safe, you are among friends – that is a warm place to be where great things can happen, where lessons can be learned, where problems can be solved or dissolved

this is a place where figuring out what matters most, who matters most and where you need to be is far more valuable than sporting a tan or knowing some local lore

it is not so much about reaching out to touch the stars as it is them reaching down to touch you; ancients here had a culture driven by climate and plentiful provisions of land and sea – today much has changed but the magic of the past is here if you let it waft over you

if you don’t have your priorities in life sorted when you get here, you surely will when you leave; I want to go home to squeeze my squeeze, catch up with Gusta to see how her vacation has been, curl up in my own bed and catch a few winks

I’ve left footprints in the sand . . they will wash away so I need to come back to leave some more

Aloha

Mark Kolke
337,372

203.8

Aloha! You sound very relaxed and well rested. The pictures are outstanding making everyone wish they were there seeing what you are seeing. I have always wanted to go to Maui but a fear of flying since I was a little girl has kept me from going. So when friends and colleagues go there they send lots of pictures so I can enjoy the scenery. I hope you took lots of pictures so you can share with all when your back. Have a safe and pleasant flight home. MJ, Calgary

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Will miss your musings and pictures from Maui - your vivid descriptions and awesome pictures has provided a vicarious break for me too! I don't receive your musings everyday but have noticed a big change in your writings from before your vacation to now - from frenetic to calm - Maui has obviously been good for you!, AK, Calgary

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Hi Mark - Sorry it is your next to the last day already. Maybe now you understand the feeling the first time after 35 years of waiting that I got to STAY here in Maui while everyone else left. You have a good dream, and someday you will be able to jump in feet first and really allow yourself to get truly wet. First you have to trust, even tho I know from intensely personal episodes that trust comes after a long time of not... Then you have to let go, and let nature perform its miracles, and the laws of true buoyancy take over. Then you can feel every little ebb and flow, every nuance, every temperature variation, every rush and soothe, every give and take, and truly be one with everything. Till then, you can walk on the shore every day, and only be an observer... if that is all there was, life wouldn't be so exciting... total immersion is all, and a true awakening of all sights, all sounds and all feelings that flow every day whether we are here or elsewhere, and they are here flowing without us unless we choose to be here. Think about it, and then choose. All the opportunity in the world is at your fingertips... JUMP IN NOW before you forget the thrill of giving it up ... Make it happen, don't blame anything else for your inaction, only you can jump. Aloha, NB, Maui and points west...

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Loved musings today. You're becoming more and more poetic - more spontaneous. Imagined myself along for the walk today... Thanks for everything. Have a wonderful departure day, CB, Calgary

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

Maui prediction today: partly sunny with scattered showers, breezy, highs 76-81, SW wind 15-25 mph with gusts to 50 mph, chance of rain 50%

revise chance of rain to 100%

wind, rain overnight, conflict of surging surf fights receding tide; earth/moon tug-o-war; the sky empty of clouds at 5:30AM; the feeling awesome, sights incredible, beginning my day on a dreamy high

I walked back from the Fairmont as clouds moved in, enveloping everything, wind and rain whipped at me (faint hearted tourists stayed inside . . missing this incredible feeling) of walking in the dark under the milky-way going out, coming back . . getting wet . . feeling so alive, so 'in the moment'

I watched whales put on a really big show . . perhaps they show off when hardly anyone is watching . . . . the photo (scroll down) was looking southward at the end of my walk this morning; I went out very early this morning – my thought to capture some pictures as light arrived but that did not work

a guy from Cleveland on the beach this morning – told me this was his last time – he flies home today; the pull of this experience is hard to let go of, so I didn’t mention that I have one more day

but, dreams end and we wake up to temper our wishes with reality, my hopes need to be reconciled with the reality that everyone else in the world is not aligned with my point of view, with my vision, with my dream

every good time has not been without its measure of difficulty, setbacks, obstacles and moments when all things appeared lost or impossible; on a bad day one might say 'no good dream goes unpunished'; on good days I see beautiful things, beautiful places, think beautiful thoughts; stormy weather brings more than the ocean spray splashing in my face - it can bring a healthy dose of reality with it

I am who I am, I offer nothing more . . and most days . . I offer nothing less; whether someone is a client, a reader, a family member, a friend, a lover . . all you get is me – real, flawed, a little nutty sometimes, passionate and feeling 110% alive - the extra 10% is not reality, not tangible – dreams, ones that come true once in a while, in all kinds of weather

what makes my dreams come true; is the impossible dream (insert music from Man of
La Mancha here) possible to achieve?

is it just in my head - or is it to be reality?

where is that dream living; do the feelings I experience here, walking these beaches, really have meaning or are they a romantic fantasy without substance, without foundation, without a chance?

a long while ago I had an experience of depression, impecuniousness and lacked the confidence to go forward; it didn’t last long - my drive returned, my spirits were lifted and good things began happening – and each year more good things happened

I am not a water baby . . but I think when people jump in the water - in the ocean, in a pool or into a situation - we cannot jump in without getting wet; I have many personal examples . . and have seen so many for others . . that jumping in, both feet - deep end of the pool - has a lot of merit; people get wet, but I think that is what jumping in is supposed t o mean

returning from my walk . . wet . . my impossible dream suddenly seems less real, more dream - maybe I should go back to bed . . try to get back into the dream

a splash of water in my face does not dampen my dreams unless I let it - or dampen my reality unless I let it; it refreshes, it startles, it provides an awakening

the weather changed in Maui this morning

I got wet

I like getting wet

how about you?

Aloha

Mark Kolke
337,396

205.8

Business is crazy busy, which is fantastic...we have 2 new sales directors and 2 coordinators now, so I am actually able to occasionally leave the office ;-) I am thrilled to inform you that I will be following your lead and heading out to Maui this April for 10 days with my daughters!!! I'm so excited to get out there. My very best friend from Vancouver that I grew up with in Winnipeg, is also coming and it will be wonderful for us all to catch up, what a fun girls trip we will have. I have been reading your musings and enjoying your pics of Maui. They make me wish I was already there. Are you all rested and relaxed now????, CN, Okotoks

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Aloha, Mark: It appears that you continue to have a delightful time here on Maui No Ka Oi. Thought that I would bring you up to date. The last lava flow that occurred, and the one over which you drove actually happened about 215 years ago...not 450. The first one, which goes on the othere side of Hana happend about 450 years ago. Thought the geologist in me should [try to] keep you on the straight and narrow. Ever think about publishing your 'journal'? It is written so well and explicitly that even if I were not familiar with Maui, after reading your blog, I certainly would feel as though I were. Malama Pono (take care), PDL , Lahaina

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You should be writing for the Hawaii Tourist Board. Today I bought tickets to Maui for 25 - 30 March...a long weekend sort of thing. Any place you know there you could recommend to stay? I want something nice - but preferably not the hotels (I've only stayed at Kanapali before - the Marriott, I think). Would love to see how it might feel to be a "local" - though, of course, I understand the skewed perspectives of a 5 day fly by. Will write more later, but children are in the mood for dinner. Fly safely! I've very much enjoyed your journeys - in every sense. Kisses, CB, Calgary

...

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

sunny, high 76-81F, SW wind 10 mph, high surf advisory; the fire appears to be out, a couple of whisps of smoke remain; morning sun had a long and glorious arrival while a storm engulfed the north half of the island leaving behind a magnificent rainbow over the valley

yesterday I went as far south as roads allow south of Makena, part of it driving through/over a lava flow area that looks as fresh as if it happened last week - hundreds of acres of rock without so much as a weed growing - I was told it was 450 years ago; at one point it is possible to walk along a trail that goes out as far as the lava spilled into ocean .. but when it says 'trail ends' (scroll down to see photo taken from there) only fools and sure footed birds would dare venture

I dozed off watching TV last night; I awoke to a ringing phone; was it the last ring or the only ring? . . . was it ringing for a long time before I woke, was it a wrong number, was it someone calling out to me, was it real, was it a dream? … was it a call from home?

I sent an email this morning - I had just hit send when the phone rang; I said ‘gee, that was fast’ . . but the email took a minute or so longer to arrive

instead of counting ‘days here’ I find myself focused on how few I have left before heading home - my morning dog-less walks will soon end; I wonder if Gusta is counting the days?

countless poems have been written about home being where your loved ones are; but what about home as a state of mind rather than a place?

I am going home soon; this has been a wonderful rest but vacations have to end, lots of things draw me back to Calgary; this time and place has been incredible, but going home will be the easiest thing I will have done since I got here

“A man travels the world over in search of what he needs and returns home to find it.”
– George Moore

3 sleeps till I am home

Aloha

Mark Kolke
337,420

206.0

Aloha Mark! Sounds from your musings like you are having a great time. I think you're right. Hawaii agrees with you and you should do whatever you can to make it a permanent residence. Instead of struggling in arctic gear and chipping nose snot off of your coat sleeve, you could wake up, slip into a pair of flip-flops and bathing trunks to take Gusta for a walk...all year long! Ahhh...what a life! Things here are fine. I had my semi-annual check up in early January and my white count was slightly higher than last time but still well within normal range. My doc did, however, find a suspicious spot on my arm so he has directed me to a dermatologist for evaluation. Too many years of sun-bathing ski vacations at the Colorado River, with Johnson's Baby Oil as my constant companion. Keep your fingers crossed.. That's it. Nothing special, certainly nothing to include in tomorrow's musings. But tell everyone I said "hi" anyway, Aloha, LR, Irvine

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Mark(Shakespeare of the Islands) .. OMG the photos you send are too beautiful... I have been saving them to gaze at in a special file... BUT here I sit in the frozen north, FA, Calgary

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

this morning began in silence; just as I was heading out the door at 5:29 some birds started their day; mostly sunny today except for the smoke plume from the fire, high around 81F at the shore, south wind at 10mph, 20% chance of rain

as breathtaking in its own way as the road to Hana, roads littered with rocks and road-
roosters and signs of 5 m.p.h. in places you dare not go that fast . . awesome; yesterday's
adventure was a drive around the north part of the island (emboldened by my Hana-
adventure) intrepid driver went past all the resorts of the north . .Kanapali, Kapalua etc,
past the views of Molokai to the west [scroll down to picture] I kept going as the road
narrowed, traffic diminished and views got better . . . and better and, as I said, the roads
got narrower; at several points the 1-lane bridge was wider than the road, 'rock on road' is literal as opposed to a warning, the word ROAD is highly interpretive, switch backs are
180 degree immediately followed by 180 degree and passing is a challenge requiring
someone to back up 1/8th of a mile or so till 2 vehicles can squeeze past each other ... in
search of banana bread - I must have been since every curve seemed to have a sign in gaudy colours saying 'Julia's best banana bread on the planet ___ miles ahead' so, meet Julia I did; I left quickly when she told me the school bus would soon be coming from the way I was going .

I stumbled a few times in dim light but mostly I could see my way by the reflective surface of the waves against the flat dullness of the sand

this morning’s walk was the most spectacular yet; early, dark, moonless, clear – the fire smaller but very intense on its southward leading edge with red and orange leaping into the night; the first part of the walk affected by lights of buildings and beach houses . . then nothing . . nothing at all, except my view of ½ the universe with stars looking so close I should reach up and touch them

a debate about trade-offs, compromise, settling, alternatives . . plays out in my head; what is so good that we would not trade it, what is worth going without because other things are so good; this is not about where to live, how to work, who to love, when to say whoa – this is about anything anywhere anytime

I think we search for answers wherever we are with whatever skills we have; if being happy, self-evolved, fulfilled and completely satisfied was easily found then why would we attend lectures, buy books, travel to mystical places? . . why would painters paint, sculptors sculpt and lovers love?

finding enlightenment, finding indescribable joy, finding the centre of ourselves is not, in my view, a task as much as a purpose; a purpose for living thoroughly

but . . . when we find that moment of joy, that sliver of peace, that taste of what matters most . . . do we want to do it together with someone or is it enough to be just there . . among the road roosters and taro-root paddies at a roadside stand eating the best banana bread on the planet

to those of you who are ‘along for the ride’ on my trip, it gives me a lot of pleasure to share my experiences with you, with 7000+ of you . . but most of all I want to share these experiences with one person

is that someone I know already, someone just around the corner I’ve not met yet or is that person an elusive ‘never to be found’ mysterious enigma

finding her, I have concluded, is part of finding me; not because I want to stop searching for answers (I think I has a few hundred thousand more hours of searching in me), but because I want to share the journey

if we share the journey with someone who is not engaged in the search but simply ‘along for the ride’, is that a compromise, a choice, a duty, a mistake?

if we share the journey by compromising our ability to find the joy, sacrificing elements which are important to us (and to our co-traveler) then what are we losing?

those I love are not with me on this trip, but they share in my journey

some of those I love share my DNA, some share my dreams, some share my views, some share my time, some share things I don’t see

can we find all those things we need in one person; for that we need to look at our reflection in a mirror and ask ‘could someone find all they need in me?’

I expect not, hope not, want not – not because I don’t feel worthy to give all of me to someone to have what they want from me – I cannot imagine someone I care about being limited to having all their needs in life met by one person, by any person – least of all by me

I think we all need more than one person in our lives; first, we need to love ourselves, next we need to love someone who matters more to us than ourselves (this is not limited to family), next we need to love those who love us, next we need to love those who don’t care for us at all just because we can, next we need to love those where everything is impossible . . because we want to and need to

I stumbled a few times in dim light but mostly I could see my way by the reflective surface of the waves against the flat dullness of the sand; I think life and love are like that too – sometimes the differences between a safe choice, a dangerous choice or one where we simply stumble getting a little wet and getting our hands dirty comes with the territory

no one decides for me, I decide for no one

Aloha

Mark Kolke
337,444

205.2

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

to be mostly clear today, 75-80F with light NE wind; I drove 54 miles to Hana (local term for ‘I white-knuckled 2 hours driving inside a rainforest canopy without getting out to pee’) yesterday; just when you think you are there some guy has a sign at his coffee shop saying ‘you are half way there’; aside from enjoying the quiet pastoral ambience of the place, my thrill on a sunny afternoon was driving BACK from Hana; capturing it on film or in words is impossible . . so, if you have not been, go . . . spend 5 hours to visit the community of Hana and you will see what I mean; I took quite a few pictures none of which are alike, none of which give one a true sense of what that place and experience along the east shore of the island is all about . . picture attached was taken just north of Ke’ane on the way back

this morning, again, darker than usual – all the better to see a spectacular sight in the dark - the growing fire up the mountain (about 6500 ft level) which has spread more southward than west having burned up about 250 acres so far (looks like more than that from down here) of dense pine forest; apparently there is more than pine at risk as naturalists are worried about the threat to four very rare plant species one of which is a member of the parsnip family

I never liked parsnips

there are many things I know, few with absolute certainty - but I know, that the things I think that I know fit very clearly into my little list; my list of my desires, of my talents; it is not a long list but it is a clear concise one – reflecting on it regularly keeps me grounded, keeps me clear, helps me separate those things which matter from those which are a passing fancy, those which are a notion without emotion

knowing what I want, desire, need, hope to have . . is not the same as having what I want, desire, need, hope to have . . but what an important first step that is

communication is not a slow thing; send an email . . it is there right away, make a call and voices volley as quickly as in person; these are no replacement for face-to-face communication where the distance between action/reaction is delayed slightly as we take time to listen to inflection, facial expression, mood and outside influences of noise, interruption and pace of someone’s day

verbal vs. non-verbal communication is quite the thing; so often people give off non-verbal clues while they are talking . . . sometimes even more when they are not talking at all; can we sense someone’s body language over the phone, can we gauge the furrow of a brow, the sadness of an eye, the drip of a tear?

can we sense anything from an email; was it shorter than usual, was it hastily sent, was it written IN CAPITAL LETTERS SO AS TO SHOUT . . or was it a nothing?

often I think we read into what is said, what is shown, what is written – a sense that we understand fully what someone else is communicating; we are wrong more than right but that doesn’t stop us, doesn’t stop me, from being blundering idiots sometime giving rise to times when I need to say ‘oops, can I retract what I said and stuff it back where it came from’ just as there are time to say . . ‘I meant every word and take back nothing’

Frankl taught me: ‘I get to choose how I react to what is happening to me’

but Frankl gave me no advice at all about how to deal with the reality that I have no control over how someone will react to me, react to what I say, react to what I do

sometimes, when we say something, write something or try to right something we get it wrong – for that we can apologize, show remorse and fix it somewhat, but what about those situations where we say exactly what we meant, when we meant it and with the appropriate care which fits for what we meant . . that’s good right?

so what about the reaction we get, is it what we expect; does it matter how others feel about us or is it really most important that we are clear on how we feel about ourselves?

my view is that being considerate of someone else’s views and feelings is important – but beyond that we have to be who we are without regard for how others might view us because if we modify ourselves to suit someone else’s expectations we lose sight of ourselves

do you know your dreams, your desires, your skills, your talents; do you have them written down and, if you do, how often do you look at them, review them, commit them to everything you do?

well, why not?

gotta go explore more paradise now . . I’ve been to Hana, what’s next?

Aloha

Mark Kolke
337,468

205.0

Your topic was right on today and fit with what I have been experiencing in my professional career. Confronting someone regarding their work ethics has not always been my strong suit and after reading your musing today I realized that maybe this is what I need to do in order to shake up this person and see if there is any true motivation in life. It's always easier to ignore the situation and deal with everything yourself, and till now that is what I have done so that waves are not caused. But maybe the waves need to happen to see if this person is really up for the challenge and if not then I can make the decision to let this person go. Thank you Mark I needed these words today. Hope your enjoying yourself and relaxing. Your an inspiration to all. All the Best, MJ, Calgary

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Still thinking about whether we are all the same........ we may have the same basic human needs and wants but we also have different personalities and make our own choices. Free societies are great to live in because we can choose to meet our human needs and wants in ways that work for us. But freedom presupposes that we let people make choices, LHE, Calgary

Your topic was right on today and fit with what I have been experiencing in my professional career. Confronting someone regarding their work ethics has not always been my strong suit and after reading your musing today I realized that maybe this is what I need to do in order to shake up this person and see if there is any true motivation in life. It's always easier to ignore the situation and deal with everything yourself, and till now that is what I have done so that waves are not caused. But maybe the waves need to happen to see if this person is really up for the challenge and if not then I can make the decision to let this person go. Thank you Mark I needed these words today. Hope your enjoying yourself and relaxing. Your an inspiration to all. All the Best, MJ, Calgary

...

Still thinking about whether we are all the same........ we may have the same basic human needs and wants but we also have different personalities and make our own choices. Free societies are great to live in because we can choose to meet our human needs and wants in ways that work for us. But freedom presupposes that we let people make choices, LHE, Calgary

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

Maui weather today: sunny, high around 79F, north winds up to 10 mph; photo attached is one I took overlooking a yard in Maui Meadows yesterday . . looking NW across the bay; note the windmills up the centre of the mountain (cannot someone design an attractive windmill or at least paint them camouflage green?) . . the views from properties up from the beach areas are extraordinary

DE was working in Kihei yesterday . . came by for a salmon dinner before heading back up-country; nice to cook for someone besides myself for a change & great conversation to boot

this morning I went out slightly later than usual; strangely it was very dark – the result of a huge dark cloud over the volcano – so my ‘trip over things’ walk on the beach was a chance to nearly collide with sleeping fishermen, their poles anchored securing in the sand, but it was still too early to see any of those crabs scrambling out of their burrows to catch the receding tide

an eerie by-product of this darkness was sight of a fire burning high above Kihei on the volcano . . larger in terms of area but less intense than it was yesterday, its glow in the dark looking like it was painted on the mountain; SC, maybe you should send down a water-bomber to help them out . .

why is it, I wonder, that we have become so conditioned in our society to withhold our emotions, to stifle how we truly feel about things?

I’ve read so much about how good it is to clearly and calmly articulate how we are feeling – and I try to practice that every day

a great thing (I think) about having time and absolute relaxation going on as I do right now is that it provides time to explore thinking about some things without a time limit as opposed to ‘a few minutes squeezed into a busy day’

some things need more mulling, but I think I am really clearer than ever on some things; maybe from conversations, maybe from beach walks, maybe from quiet nights alone – maybe from all of those

we are all the same, we are all different, we are all at different stages on the cycle of things, we all experience the same emotions and none of this is contradictory

the difficulty I think is not so much in saying ‘I feel __________ about this/you/us/them and I think ________ is what I should do about it’ etc. . . but rather the reaction we expect/fear might come from someone else

confronting this silly fear is really more difficult than admitting it is silly; I’ve found it easier to ‘say it the way it is’ to strangers sometimes than I can with people I’ve known for a long time; too often I think the tendency is to avoid saying what we feel, what needs to be said, what we want to say because of fear of losing the connection we enjoy with someone, of endangering or altering it somehow; I used to think that way and behave that way – but thankfully I changed that to a large degree

sure, I’ve lost some acquaintances and some prospective clients as a result of being more forthright, but I’ve not lost a single good friend, I’ve not lost a connection that matters with any family member or client or damaged any interdependent relationship with anyone; I have found that I have built, enhanced and improved some though

tell me how you really feel

really

yes, really

I need to know, want to know

not sugar coated, not finessed, not disguised, not turned down a few notches – but the reality

I want that from people who care about me just as I have come to learn they want that from me in return

reciprocity is the tool, directness and honesty are the ingredients

air we breath gives us life

if we have something tainted, altered or misrepresented as air we would not see it but we would feel it, be affected by it and its toxic effects would injure or kill us

avoiding reality in our relationships has no less a toxic effect; maybe this is too dramatic an analogy .. but I don't think it overstates it at all

go ahead, try it; trust me, it works

if there is someone in your life you dislike, examine what it is about their behaviour you have trouble with and talk to them about it, make it something that is not an argument starter but simply a statement of how you feel . . not to defend or debate . .but just to say

is there someone who is not giving you what you want, what you need?

why not examine that, and examine if there is something that person is not getting from you?

imagine the difference between an open discussion and a superficial one; imagine the difference between the giving and the getting when truth is told; imagine the difference between defending a position that is not true and advancing one that is real, true and comes from the core of you

it might be easier to imagine when we are relaxed, at peace, have minimal stresses or pressures in our daily lives; every day we ALL get to choose whether we want to share ourselves openly with the people in our world – or not

maybe, just maybe, when we don’t get what we want it might be because we have not asked for what we want; maybe we ask for things that avoid dealing with what we are really wanting and needing (or kneading) because of fear that someone will not like us, want us, love us or care about us if they know us deeply with integrity

but that is the magic . . . open up . . . overcome that useless fear . . . display your real self to those who care about you the most – start with yourself, then another, and then another

I’m in the mood to go exploring . . . or examining . . . or both

which characterizes you today?

Mark Kolke
337,492
205.6

Good morning Mr. Muser: We are recalling your vacation...Obviously you aren't having enough FUN yet... SO, maybe I'll be boogie boarding while you are walking tomorrow morning, if I ever get home and get to bed. Just thought I'd say hi and let you know I was at least here for a few days... I liked your analogies to waves... I like that relentless surging and pounding myself, and gentle caressing when the sun goes down and the after glows... Talk to you soon I hope, Aloha, NB, Kihei

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Love reading you sometimes because I treasure your take but I see myself. To me, the tide typifies female behavior. She blames it on the moon or perhaps the tsunami somewhere else and shifts the sand because she can. She is drawn by the moon, capricious in her rhythms, unpredictable, tantalizing and mesmerizing. She lifts and embraces many. She guides the sharks to some. She knows where the rocks are. Her temperature changes are astonishing. The beach is macho. He is solid and warm. pretty sure of his footing. He embraces a plethora of people, yet is tickled by the tiniest things. He may seem to retreat now and then, or even be washed away, but he indomitably stands and is known. Whoever criticized your musing yesterday has probably never been to Maui where your head goes soft and you hardly notice. Hope you get to Hana. The gods await, VJP, DeWinton

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Great pictures Mark!!!!!, KP, Calgary

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

clear, waves bigger today (does that mean surf’s up?), high around 78F, NE breeze 10- 15 mph.

yesterday . . BUSY . . a conference call on the beach, some email traffic regarding new business, talked to some friends at home, explored residential areas of Kihei and Wailea, a 2 hour massage - I found great comfort on Davika’s table yesterday (move over Eva, you may have been replaced as my favorite), had a long walk in bright sunshine with strong breeze blowing along Sugar Beach (for those on the muser publication list, scroll down for photo … north of Kihei as the coast bends toward Ma’alaea . . I only covered ¼ of it . . more another time, the beach is long and smooth as were the waves), postponed golf game because shoulder is still hurting (hence need for the massage), picked up some groceries, did a load of laundry . . ho-hum . . routine day in paradise, early to bed last night because I forgot to take a nap

shoulder still sore . . no golf today . . maybe another massage would be in order!

someone suggested yesterday that I was a little over-the-top regarding wave/beach comments and that the sensual innuendo was too obvious; now pay attention . . I wasn’t over the top, I was just getting warmed up

the messages available (if we want to take them) from nature … be that critter survival, vegetation cycles or behaviour of the weather, there are countless lessons learned over millions of years we might do well to learn from . . that is how I view it

or, maybe I am just looking for examples that support my views - whatever . . there is too much to enjoy, appreciate and think about here to waste time with critics who are mired in their own stuff

waves don’t leave a beach for a smoother shore, for softer more pliant sand from which to make more little beaches; the waves are strong yet when they crash they crash on themselves – taking that blow – before flowing gently onto their receptive beach

sometimes waves bring things, leaving gifts of driftwood, coral and smooth rocks to help build a bigger more stable beach, sometimes they make music, sometimes they are calm, sometimes they are in a rage

these beaches have, I think, a feminine nature - the waves hang out with other waves and act more like guys; the beach and wave are so much like men and women in relationships it is difficult to understand unless you are standing right there as waves wash past you, then retreat swirling around your ankles . .

a beach doesn’t complain that its soft warm sand got mussed by choppy water the other day because the calm waters sooth and smooth the surface as they bring back more sand; the waves pay homage to the beach 24/7, 365 days a year, millennium in, millennium out . . now THAT is a committed relationship

I wonder if anyone has ever walked around the entire island on a beach .. then written a book about it . . hhhmm . . now that’s worth further thought

back from my walk, papaya and coffee and a bagel, blue sky and a view of the water (through the palm trees and condos) . . the waves are resting till I come back to watch their show again

Aloha from Maui . . may your day be as ordinary as another routine day in paradise, I’m embracing it

time for a nap . . or a beach walk . . or a drive . . or to curl up with a book

Mark Kolke
337,540

205.2

Hi Mark, though I know what is happening in your life (through your musings I receive each day)thought I would just drop you and line and wish you a great holiday. I am heading on my annual to the sun vacation next week and can truly relate to the need for relaxation and get away from the phone etc time. As most people, I work too much and do not spend enough quality time for just me. One day would like to meet you (and Gusta of course) though I wonder what Gusta would think of my rodent sized dogs. Anyway, hello, nice to finally get the nerve to say hello, J, Calgary

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Aloha Mark, Embrace the sun, sand and ocean for me - your musings bring back wonderful memories of what an idyllic place Maui is. A big hug and a big kiss for you. Cheers, GT, Calgary

Aloha! It was truly a pleasure meeting you on Sunday. I had a delightful time. Mahalo, again for your kindness in treating me to dinner. Please forward one of your newsletters. I am interested to see your business writing. Your personal blog is most entertaining. I asked if you were ever a teacher because of your vocabulary and gift for writing and speaking. Malama Pono. A Ke Akua, PRLC, Lahaina

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In an oppressive environment, silence doessn’t mean compliance or agreement. Workers may work, players may play, painters may paint, thinkers may think, but writers.. They have the obligation of thinking, researching, analyzing, and thinking some more before they write, EJ, DeWinton

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Your writing is inspired this week. When I was there some 25 years ago, I stayed in a condo complex called Maui Kai, about 7 miles out of Laihana. If you happen to be driving by, could you note if they are still there? , SB, Calgary P.S.: Are you dating CB?

...

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

Maui weather today: sunny, highs around 78, NE winds around 10 mph.

attached picture taken cliff above the ‘surfing beach’ just east of Pa’ia, east side of the island, on the beginning of the road to Hana; Pa’ia, an old plantation town now home to leftover hippies from the 60’s, art galleries, craft shops, restaurants and real estate offices congregated to slow traffic . . . anyway, the photo (scroll down) looks northward catching the north part of the island and those waves waving, waves that draw an overflowing parking lot of beat up vans sporting shiny new surf boards on their roof racks; their owners call it surfing but I think waving is a better word

yesterday was a great day of wander/wonder driving around after a morning of laziness, dinner with DE in Makawao (just imagine Elmer Fudd saying that) . . . very pleasant re-connect with someone I met last year; some people are gentle people you meet along the way . . . not necessarily ones who change your life with sharp turns - ones for spending soft pleasant time with . . kind and unassuming . . a nice catch-up; Makawao is a charming little up-country town with great views to the Pa’ia surf and across the valley to the west

there are people in life who take while others, they take care; some take care of themselves, some take care of the world, some take care of others; the ones who take care of others, in my experience, offer the rest of us a safe place to some home to . . a safe welcoming place to come home to . . . and they will be waving

life and writing offer three kinds of feedback – praise, criticism and silence – each brings lessons , actions, reactions, emotions and begs a thousand questions

the answers in life are in the praise, they are in the critique . . . but mostly they are in the silence

silence can be the quiet of night or the outrageous yelling of those waves all day – saying, look at me, I am the source of life, I am the source of knowing, I am a wave

Hafiz wrote: I can think of no greater devotion than to be shore to your ocean

CB & GP …your comments were resonating with me as I walked this morning as I watched the endless throb of wave upon wave upon wave, surging, pulling back, surging again . . bringing and taking away in equal measure as it has done for so long; these waves don’t ask ‘is it ok if I do this?’ or ‘why must I leave this all behind?’

Hafiz understood

workers work, players play, painters paint, thinkers think, writers write, and waves wave

sand washed up on, under and through my sandals as waves waved; these waves are a message to me, to you, to everyone – to not question what we are compelled to do, want to do, need to do

this place is so tranquil yet energetic; hibiscus hedges with their yellow and orange flowers rim a hotel property as it meets the ‘public beach’ area, a separation of conventionality from the wild thrashing of the surf on the lava, bushes steady as their flowers flick their stamens about in the breeze - while each wave is spent, lays wasted upon the rocks to slide back beneath the next, awaiting the next surge as it comes on as strong or stronger than the last . . relentlessly licking every corner of the beach, continuing all day until the tide takes it to a high point of domination covering all . . . before shrinking back all day, recovering so that its waves can pound again

a wave waving has a soft landing on the sand, a loud one on the rocks; symbolic I suppose of how some people order drinks . . something soft and creamy poured over rocks . . then tossed back on a hot tongue; this sensation gives pleasure as, no doubt, the waves get each time they land

waving, silently . . . crashing loudly on the shore

this morning the shore waved back

Hafiz would be pleased

Aloha

Mark Kolke
337,540

206.2

Beautifully written..been there and done that however you have captured in writing both the unique setting and the unsettling mood of being alone in paradise. I can identify with your feelings. I once read.. man does not attract that which he wants...they attract that which they are...enjoy Maui! , GP, Calgary

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Good god - didn't know you would print that response! You never cease to surprise me. My dear (and you need not feel compelled to share this), today's column seemed to mark a change of sorts. Uncontrived. Until this morning it seemed as if you were sifting the sands for words out there by the beach, but this column appeared to write itself - and carried you along in the process. Maybe I responded as I did because something in this piece spoke to/of/or for me..."thinking of this as the home I haven't moved to yet." Exactly what I had until the developers raped Michigan. What it is I need to feel reconnected with my soul. Perhaps it is less important that I live someplace than that I anticipate doing so. Perhaps it is the same for relationships...I want to dream of what I will have, knowing that the dreaming has proved so much more vibrant than the living. You've arrived! Enjoy. Still wish I were there, CB, Calgary

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Have a rum coconut juice for me! Have fun, JL, Calgary

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Hi Mark, I am loving reading your musings each day...you long ago inspired me to begin my own blog. Thank you for this. I have changed my email.... I have created a new account XXXX Please forward onto me there..Thanks, DH, ?

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Loved the self-portrait!!!, SA, Calgary

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I also think of Maui as the home I haven't moved to yet. Came from California to Oahu, and hope to someday move to Maui. Loved the post, very lyrical. Your thoughts about "alone but not lonely" and "the thought will just have to do" speak to me. Thank you! :), S?, Oahu

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[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

Maui weather today: isolated showers this afternoon, highs around 81 at the shore, SW winds up to 10 mph, chance of rain 20%; attached picture (scroll down) of West Maui Mountains (2 of them anyway) taken from roadside as the sun was going down when I drove to Lahaina for dinner yesterday

yesterday was ‘newsletter work day’ for me so some relief was required; first a long walk on the Kam beaches (Kamaole I, II, III and Charley Young Beach) amid Sunday afternoon crowds – tourists + locals getting their kids out to build sand castles before a picnic on the beach

as afternoon sun broke through I spent an hour or so working on my tan at a quieter beach

last year – sitting on a beach, I began a book ‘The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire’ by Deepak Chopra; on returning home I set it aside . . looked at it a few times but never picked it up with any focus until I returned here – that seemed a fitting way to finish it – and yesterday I did; I am not so sure I got anything special out of the wait, but it seemed like this was a book I should read on a beach, one that I should read HERE on a beach, the same beach; symbolism was not my concern but the surroundings and the mood it evoked were - a good choice I think, a good read that provoked lots of thinking and a better understanding of self . . or maybe just a better perspective on beaches

when I first came to Maui (6 yrs ago I think it was) my reaction after 40 minutes was ‘I want to live here’; at that point I had no sense of its magic, its ‘centre of the universe’ feel, the mood it invokes or its many pleasures; nonetheless its pull was strong, immediate and clear

recently I've found a much more centered feeling for myself; the ‘centre of the universe’
feeling is something I could probably enjoy in many places the world over, but for now I'll
keep thinking of this as the home I haven't moved to yet . . . . so the thought will just have to do

the ‘sun in my eyes’ drive to Lahaina for dinner with DLC was as enjoyable as a 2 lane ‘emergency stopping only’ twisting turning road can be . . but worth the trip; lovely meal, lovely company, lovely town followed by a drive back under a clear moonless sky . . . stars seem so much closer here, a place where city glare is a thousand miles away

this morning's walk . . only the Labrador and his walker were out in front of me, otherwise
the carvings of the outgoing tide left me a fresh landscape to imprint; I caught up to
Honey-Bear which is a peculiar name for a black dog, but it is fitting for that bear-like
appearance

one walker stood out this morning; I’ve seen him each day near the Fairmont end of my walk . . most likely a resident of one of those multi-million dollar condos; he is mid to late 80’s, he walks with a cane; a big man who walks with an easy gait, his casual clothes indicate high quality and good taste – an elderly gentle man image if there ever was one; his Bose headset hooked to an I-pod cranked up loud enough I could sound but not make out the tunes . . but watching him ‘walk to his music’ felt good as it appeared to give him some lightness in his steps . . maybe he should meet Honey-Bear

I wonder if I will be doing that 30 years from now with a dog and/or a two legged companion, or alone like him

I see lots of people here who look lonely; some are alone, some not

I see lots of people here who look joyous; some are alone, some not . . but I am sure
those happy ones . . the alone ones who are not lonely, those solitary AND happy ones are not alone in their minds . . . . so the thought will just have to do

. . then again, alone is ok today, just not every day

I returned to my condo to re-schedule today’s
golf to another day, tasting some sweet
mango (spontaneous fulfillment of desire'), sipping great coffee; I think a drive
somewhere is in order . . . up-country or the volcano . . or not

sometimes we can get as much pleasure thinking about something special as we can by actually experiencing it . . . not exactly the same, but consider this . . if you want to enjoy the sweetness of that mango there will be times when the mango is not available . . so the thought will just have to do

Aloha

Mark Kolke
337,564

205.4

[written & published at Kamaole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

Maui weather today: sunny, isolated afternoon showers, high 81 at the shore, light south winds up to 10 mph this afternoon, chance of rain 20%; birds started singing at 5:43AM; today’s photo attachment (scroll down) shot from the Makena North course, looking south-westerly over the 15th green

yesterday was mostly cloudy wherever I was; my 92 was a happy 1st round of the year - included 1 par, a handful of delightful shots, the remainder need work as do my right hand and left shoulder (I resist using any word that sounds close to arthritic); I need to remember athletes who are not hurting a little are just not enjoying the game enough; I had fun playing
with Bill and Barbara from Minneapolis (their 3rd round of the year) in their early 60's they giggle way more than most - Barbara explained they don't play for money, they play for sex; he spots her a stroke a hole but I think he cheats on the score card so she can win, so he can pay up; they DID NOT invite me to join them for après golf drinks as I think they were in a hurry to get back to their room; if this was the restaurant scene in 'When Harry Met Sally' I think I'd ask the waiter if I could have what they are having

mahola to LS who pointed out my spelling of Kamaole had a vowel error . . now repaired; yesterday I wrote about our ‘sameness’; EJ took exception to nearly every syllable in a pissy reply I won't be printing - proof positive I was right - as I remember so many times my knee has jerked in ways I couldn't control because I was hurting over something I thought had never happened to anyone else or when I'd never felt so wronged before . . because, even in that self-indulgent petulant behaviour, from time to time we have all done it . . we are ALL the same
my POINT, is that in all our shapes, sizes, roles in life and deepest nature .... that we are alike, the same, have the same needs and have, largely, the same experiences in life; I mean . . we spend so much of our efforts to outwardly show how unique and different we are, we aspire to creature comforts . . to 'things' as merit badges of achievement . . when deep down we are ALL the same
we all have needs, wants, hopes, desires and capabilities that are ALL the things humans are capable of . . you, me , everyone . . it is ALL the same
we can masquerade as many things – as rich man, poor man; as hard working or lazy; as using our abilities or not; living up to our potential or down to some common denominator; we can be anything we want, go wherever we want or do whatever we want – the only thing stopping us is our struggle/or not with our own mind; the only obstacle between each of us and the life we dream of is our approach in our own minds; in this we ARE all the same

our need to be loved, to have someone to love; our need for warmth and food and worthy challenges in life is universal – and – while our DNA proves our individual uniqueness, our frailty and humility in the face of life’s realities proves as surely as anything physical or medical that we are all the same; like socks we come in a variety of styles, sizes, colours and material differences . . but we are ALL the same . . it matters not if we are going to or coming from Minneapolis or Calgary or Kenosha or Namibia or Maui . . we ARE all the same

EJ, you can pretend to be so very different from all the rest, you can vent today because you are not happy about your circumstances . . someone else will tomorrow . . another next month, but the emotions coursing through you, the drivers motivating you are no different than those that drive us all, no different than the menu of choices we all have from time to time; in our struggle to be unique decision makers in our own lives that distinguish ourselves as unique – which we are – the desires, pursuits, processes and emotions are ALL the same

this morning's walk was spectacular . . but 5 human and 1 canine set of footprints preceded me southbound; I never caught up to the jogger, I passed the others; as I came up to the guy walking his 'Bouvier-look' dog I found the footprints double the size of Gusta's . . more like a small bear than a dog; the owner explained his Newfoundland was sporting a bad short haircut; his dog old, he walked at its pace . . we are ALL the same

early morning beach sightings included sandals and toys forgotten, holes and trails of recently vacated sand crabs and folks who spent the night on the beach; not homeless types or left-overs from parties, a mix of singles and couples, chose to spend the night with overwhelmed by the soothing relentless pulse of the surf . . .

I saw one whale breeching this morning . . then the fluke arched high in the air, then sliding beneath the waves as if filmed in slow motion

I passed Toronto Julie and her hubby walking; as he looked on with a cranky ‘how do you know this guy?’ look on his face - she advised they had not seen any whales today; I smiled and walked on, keeping my sighting treasure to myself until I could share it with people I care about; are we ALL the same?

I think so

I’m hunkering down today to do some work so I can play later; somewhere far away someone else is hunkering down today so they can play later . . that’s how I see it; hope you can work and play and hope and dream just like everyone else

that is, if it is all the same to you

aloha

Mark Kolke
337,588

204.5

Kamaole, LS, Maui

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Hi Mark! I'm sure you're enjoying the surf, the sun, and the many unique gestures of 'all' those sexy island women. In all that timelessness -- be sure you expose 'the butterfly' every now & then. Aloha....bebe :) , Calgary

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You called for restaurant recommendations. Here's a few:
- You can't beat Roy's in the mall by the highway. Extraordinary food, at high prices.
- Fish and Poi (in Kihei and a couple of other places around the island). This is great food at more reasonable prices. Haven't found a bad dish there yet.
- Outback Steak House, again at the mall by the highway. It's a chain, but we've yet to find a better Ribeye outside of Calgary. Meals include a salad and all the fixen's. Get it to go and enjoy the meal back on your lanai as the sun sets.
- Peggy Sues. Great burgers, fries, milkshakes and music.
- Alexander's. Take out fish and chips. Downscale but tasty.
There's a few. Enjoy your trip, RH, Calgary

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Hi - For future reference - A quick blister cure is to band-aid a hunk of fresh aloe to your blister as soon as you notice the burn appearing, leave it there all night and change as often as the aloe is absorbed. You can put the gel on a band-aid in the absence of fresh. I always rub my feet with 100% aloe before going to bed when I'm traveling and walking a lot. It puts a chill on the accumulated wear and tear. And for anyone over 50 you can use foot powder during the day to reduce friction 'cause foot powder is only for those beyond the "cool" pale. ch, chimacum

[written & published at Kameole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

Maui forecast for today: highs around 81 at the shore, gusts up to 30 mph in the morning; birds started chirping at 5:47; everything seems the same every day here

yesterday’s blister forced a golf postponement, Lahaina trip adjourned to Sunday – I just hung around, drove around, went to the beach, ate, hung around … ho-hum, just another stressful day

thanks to those who enjoyed yesterday’s photo of intrepid traveler; today’s is Big Beach (Oneloa Beach) shot looking southward from atop the lava cliff that separates the two beaches (photos frowned upon at Little Beach (Oneuli Beach) - check this link for a great aerial perspective http://www.discoveringhawaii.com/SF_SecretBeaches/SbMAMakena.html)

afternoon wind was really strong yesterday so the body-surfing, for those who do that, was great while spectators enjoyed the show

as I walked early again, tai chi classes for beginners underway at various points along my
route as they are every day, artist Julie from Toronto sitting out in front of the Renaissance Hotel said 'did you see that whale that just jumped?', swore she'd seen seven whales in ten minutes; I chatted with her for fifteen and we did not see one; smooth move Julie . . but married women on the make are not my scene

drink servers, snorkel rental and activity vendors each ready their stalls for another routine day; the housekeeping staff at the hotels make fresh towel mountains while their grounds keeping counterparts snip, clip and sweep as they have each done a thousand days before - these servants who live many families to a house in poverty - serving the rich and the wannabee rich tourists as if it is the most natural thing they will ever do; I don’t think I'd last a day at that without dumping a bucket of ice on someone

walking in the twilight shadows of beach houses, condos and 5-star hotels I wonder what the whales and tortoises must think – looking at this vignette in the timelessness of this place; the development of the last 30 years or so is but a moment in the timelessness of this place

as I watch expressions on faces, it is hard to get a fix on it – but I think people come here to solve problems, as if just being here is not solution enough; there is a walking around look that many people have here that melds enjoyment of surroundings with looking for something they have not found

maybe I am seeing on the faces of others something I am feeling myself; a sense the solution is here to be found, the challenging questions in our lives will miraculously be answered in this special place where rest, creature comforts, soft sand, warm sun and gentle breezes are abundant - but, I think it is more than setting the scene, becauise no scene could be better than this one

as we walkers meander on sand that may have visited many shores, as we watch waves that have traveled all over the world – I think the amazement is enhanced because we are both equals and we are appreciating the timelessness of everything here; all the water on earth has been here all the time; all the sand on earth has been here all the time

the answers we seek in the sand, in the waves, in the beautiful sky are the same fundamental ones we all face all the time; we are all the same, we are all moving through lives so indistinguishable from one another that the wise old whales and tortoises would say 'they are not like us, those people, they all look the same'

we do, we are, we can never not be

we live in different cities, adorn ourselves differently and think we are so individual in our tastes, our interests, our pursuits, our professions and businesses . . but we are as identical as chimps in a cage

why then, if I am right about this, do we struggle so much to be individuals, to be 'our own man' as it were; why is it we need to be close to some, distant from others and to deliberate so long on decisions?

we are all the same

every decision that could ever be made has been made

every problem that could be encountered has been encountered

every potential solution has been tried and reduced to statistics

so why do we struggle then?

we have the best brains of all the species, we have the ability to see the sense in life but so many of us struggle to find sense in it

I know, because I see it on faces every day; I see it at home, I see it here

our relationships with each other must spring from our relationships with ourselves; this must begin with elimination of conflict – with each other and within ourselves

the answers are not here, but the peaceful surroundings in which we can reach inside to pull those answers out . . those surroundings are here; they are announced every morning at 5:47

they are here all day, every day as they have always been

it makes me wonder, before volcanoes rose from the ocean floor to create this paradise, where did people go to have a vacation in paradise?

where did they look for inspiration?

we can only look inside inside where it has always been rather than to outside forces, scenery, advice books; we might do it through the meditative repetition of painting a wall . . or striking a ball . . or walking a beach

it may all be a moment in the timelessness, but for now, I’ll take 4½ hours starting at 10:16 at Makena North . . fore!

aloha

Mark Kolke
337,612

203.8

Hello, Mark - I started receiving your musings from a good friend of mine, and am now hooked - your walks provide a getaway for one who doesn't seem to be able to get away. Could you please add me to your email list, as I would love to keep using your musings as a way to divert my attentions away from the stresses of the ordinary and mundane...enjoy the remainder of your solace from the real world, and thanks for taking the time to add me, CR, Calgary

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Mark, don’t know why I didn't send you this before. My friend in Maui hasa web page: XXXXXXX She is married by the way, so I am not fixing you up, (maybe she has a friend?) and I just remembered she is in Las Vegas this weekend. Your talk of the nude beach and whales reminded me of her, she is all over that! CS in Maine

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Hello Mark: We just turned from Kihei last Saturday (we have a place at Kihei Akahi just down the road from you a bit). Some restaurant suggestions:
Seawatch restaurant at one of the golf courses down in Wailea. http://www.seawatchrestaurant.com/ When you phone, ask what night Jamie Lawrence is there---a very, very talented James Taylor-esque singer/guitar guy….he also plays at the Tommy Bahama restaurant in the Shops at Wailea –also a very, very good restaurant—fun for lunch or dinner. He sells a CD—buy it.
Sarentos- just down the way towards Wailea by the Best Western.
Best on the island is Mama’s Fish House, near Paia. Excellent, great views—make a reservation
Café Mambo-30 Baldwin Avenue Paia (go for lunch)
There is Spago’s in the Four Seasons Hotel, Wailea (it was ok, asked when we made res if we were staying at the hotel, we said no and ended up at the leper table which we quickly corrected!) There is another restaurant at the Four Seasons—Ferraro’s—not bad—more casual
HumuHumu (owned by Mel Tillis—I’m kidding) In the Grand Wailea Resort….excellent (fish)
Maalea Grill in Maalea—right by the aquarium---great
Irish Pub at Blue Course in Wailea.
Hope this helps…CS, Calgary

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So….what are you going to wear tomorrow?, SB, Calgary

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Hi Mark. First time replying to your musings. As I sit here in my office this PM reading about your adventure in Hawaii my mind roams back a year ago to my wife and my first trip there. Just as you describe. I can hear the birds, see the sun come up at 6:30 and smell the ocean. Thanks for the gentle reminder that there’s more to life than work and work, DM, Calgary

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aloha, Mark: Reservations have been made for 6 PM at I'o Restaurant. Looking forward to meeting you, PDL, Lahaina

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I love the new picture!! LOL I can tell you're having a great time - brings back many memories of Maui and Kaui and makes me want to return - soon. Enjoy the rest of your vacation, SH, Calgary

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Hi Mark - Hope your day has been good. I am in the office for a few and just thought I'd say another thanks for last night. Even tho the service sucked, the company was great!!! Thanks for your forbearance. Make sure you either give some fortunate person the rest of the wine, or cork it and save it for me. It was a REALLY good bottle, and it would be a shame to dump it... At least use it for cooking or something... to entice the lady with the Mercedes... whatever... lol... anyway, make sure we touch base again, Take care, and again thanks for the lovely evening, keep watching those stars, and try to get your tan perfected. Aloha,, NB, Kihei

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Hi, Love the photo of the still life with pineapple. Have fun in the sun S&EK, Suffolk, UK

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my oh my....you are wasting away to nothing in Hawaii.....thanks for allowing us to share in your vacation....BP, Cochrane

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[written & published at Kameole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

weather here is predicted to be mostly sunny, breezy, highs around 80 at the shore . . so boring, just like yesterday

Little Beach (Hawaiian name for Little nude Beach) in the Makena state park welcomed me back yesterday for some afternoon ‘reading’ and sun-bathing; if you were naked on a regular beach you would stand out, at this one you stand out if you are not

while I think everyone there enjoys 'scenery', for most people the nudity is just part of the tanning experience, as oblivious to those folks who sport the best designed/hard body tanning surface as they are to those sporting built-in sagging cushions though the close-shave and hairless exhibits can be eye catching; this small beach is a little challenging to get at - a hike up and over a lava cliff at the north end of 'Big Beach' (Hawaiian name for 'clothes worn here'); the most compelling site yesterday was the view of a group of whales and their pups breaching and spraying . . . just close enough to see, just far enough away to not show up in a photo - gives the term 'whale watching' on that beach a whole new meaning; they have been coming here forever, they keep coming back again and again and again . . . so do the whales

I stopped at the Makena pro shop to book golf times, bought gouda and gruyere at ‘Who Cut The Cheese?’, sunscreen at Long’s but, to my surprise, found that Azeka’s ribs, a Maui institution, is closed and out of business; where will visitors get their Maui ribs?

I had a very nice visit and dinner with NB, a Kihei real estate pro and recent muser who brought me up to date and introduced me to a new restaurant – the food at Buzz's Wharf was good, the service poor - NEXT ! . . restaurant recommendations sought . .

sipping my first cup of coffee , no sign of daylight, birds started chirping at 5:47AM, stopped (one of the ferrel cats must have been prowling among them), then resumed more gradually at 6:00 . .I guess they got ahead of their wake up call; twilight arrived at 6:30 . . off I went to the beach but a detour (grumbling tummy) to the Cinnamon Roll Fair for an ooie-gooie-treat, just the thing to get my walk off to a great sugar-high start

a few people chat while they walk, but those are few

most of us walk silently in ones, the twosomes must be late sleepers

no crowd, just a stream of people who want to make eye contact, who want to say good-mornin’, interspersed with joggers, artists sketching shades of blue gray haze where water meets sky in the west while the volcano, fully backlit, has yet to reveal today’s sun show

some stop to stare at critter life left in a pool by a receding tide, others pause to reflect on what life is all about, some speed by at a frenetic pace - like gulping dessert instead of savouring every delicious mouthful; a feast for the senses - I can't smell so I miss that part, but my other senses are working overtime to compensate

while I do walk for the physical stimulation, I can do that anywhere

if nature is religion, surely the beach must be the church; I stop here and there . . feeling an obligation to be respectfully silent – just to listen to the relentless rolling of waves, landing at my feet – falling back, then coming back again and again and again and again

this is not the hereafter, but if you believe in life after death, this place is surely one of the stops along the way where life before death is at its most spectacular; this place is a feast for the sighted . . . which makes me wonder if the sounds and odours provide a true sense of this place for a blind person; I am sure they can see it too

by the time I made it to the Fairmont I’d raised a blister (wrinkled sock methinks) so it was time to ‘take a cab back’ - the driver, Bill from southern California, came here at 18 in 1973, met a hula girl – 34 yrs and 7 grandchildren later he seems pretty happy owning 2 cabs and driving 2 days a week

today will likely be an explore some more and 'enjoy some more sunbathing without becoming lobster-like' day, maybe a drive up to Lahaina . . maybe not

hard to distinguish days of the week here

or to care much about the hour of the day

or to worry about it

some people 'come to their senses', realizing their workload does not permit an escape to this paradise - that is normal, practical, sensible, rational and essential because someone has to keep the wheels turning back home instead of savouring every delicious mouthful here . .

I’m happy to have left my senses, sensibility and workload at home

rather than come to my senses, I am glad I've come to Maui and I will keep coming back again and again and again - to a place that is a feast for the senses

Mark Kolke
337,636

205.5

set your alarm? have you lost your mind? enjoy - enjoy - enjoy There are pina coladas/mai tais/elderberry juice whatever calling you - or have you given up the nectar of the gods?, DJ, Calgary

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Enjoy Japan! HAppy New Year, Best Regards, JD, ?

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I think you mean Keawekapu !?! Not sure how I got on your list; watched new years fireworks from Keawekapu beach, the love of my life . . have a wonderful time, remember Maui is precious to many, JAW, Big Island of Hawaii

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hey, bubba, have fun in the sun. tell all. ; ) toastmasters' last night was great - the usual laughs and hilarity. 16 people showed up. moxie's a hoot. what a fun bunch. you'll miss helena's speech next week. not to mention my birthday. cheers, kk, Calgary

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Your in Hawaii, your picture at the bottom of the email should reflect that! We want to see flowered shirts, a lei, shorts and a pair on sandals…..I mean what else do you have to do? Have a great trip, I am sure many of us are living vicariously through you right now! Cheers, SB, Calgary

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Mark never got a chance to wish you a wonderful trip of great peace, straight shots down the fairway and crisp thinking. Enjoy, FE, Calgary

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You said, "I was awakened by a cacophony of birds, birds of paradise perhaps, I guess I set the alarm incorrectly but for a first day that's OK" . . . You were chorused by the partridge family, dubbed by a Calgary wag more than thirty years ago as the "black 'n decker" birds. Good you don't drink because that racket is murderous to someone with a hangover. If you listen at sunset, you'll hear them rustling in the trees, settling for the night. Throw out a little birdseed while you sing your Partridge family songs. At about 7:45 AM, the cardinals, mountain cardinals and doves will arrive. They do make a mess -- but who cares when it's cold where you come from and you miss your dog? VJP, DeWinton

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Aloha, Mark: Have you been trying to call me? A man keeps calling and all I hear is "I have been trying to reach you"...no number, no name on either my ID or his message. SO, if you are trying to reach me, XXXXX is my cell. Please also try my home: XXXX . You can leave a local number where you can be called if I am not at home or don't answer. I really enjoy your knack for writing and your descriptions put me 'at the scene'. Looking forward to meeting you this week. PDL, Lahaina

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Mark, that was the next best thing to being there. Thanks for the sharing, SB, Calgary

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I missed your call this morning, since I was just getting in from a week on Oahu doing business. I am looking forward to meeting you, finally, and am glad the weather is being so cooperative. It is probably the only place in the northern hemisphere with such wonderful day in day out temperatures, and I am sure you are loving every minute being here... Hope you had a good trip.Aloha, NB, Kihei

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Find any "footprints" in the sand?, GT, Calgary

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Your deserving of a great holiday. Take this time to enjoy your surroundings and enjoy the peacefulness. MJ, Calgary

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CD of our office generously shared your Kihei dialogue with us. I have been holidaying in Maui for 17 years and, like you, can't wait to return "home" with each trip. Your birds of paradise are actually "Black Francolins" whose raucous sounds make me smile and stay with me thousands of miles away. Keawakapu has been our favorite beach for years and I can't tell you how much I enjoyed the walk you took us on. I've been back in Calgary for almost two weeks and I miss the sun and surf already. Enjoy your trip, AL, Calgary

[written & published at Kameole Sands, Kihei, Maui]

forecast today, mostly sunny with isolated showers, highs around 80 at the shore , chance of rain 20%; I slept late so my beach walk did not start till after 8 . .

my flight yesterday was a 2 stage one with 5 hours at LAX in between; the wait was worth it because Row 29 on the Maui leg of the flight was great - Steve the car cleaning products salesman from Akron bound for Lahaina to visit his friend who runs the Bubba Gump restaurant there, Sue the dancer and personal trainer from NYC bound for Kihei to meet her sister for r&r, swimming and restaurant exploration . . and I . . had as pleasant a time as any 3 strangers are permitted

maybe it is ‘becoming a frequent visitor’, maybe it is because I am familiar with geography and process – but when I drove from the Hertz lot to Kihei last night I felt like I was coming home after seven months on vacation in Calgary; proof positive that what happens in Maui, never stays in Maui – it brings you back any time you think of it

I was awakened by a cacophony of birds, birds of paradise perhaps, I guess I set the alarm incorrectly but for a first day that’s OK

my morning walk on my favorite and most frequently walked beach: Keawa Kapu starts at the Five Palms hotel just south of the Kihei boat launch, a 45 minute walk south to the Fairmont where beach walking gear would need to be replaced by rock climbing equipment, then back again with an apple Danish and coffee reward at the Fairmont; mostly beach and some paths like a sea wall above the rocks, the view is unparalleled

it is whale watching season, but the only thing bobbing were scuba boats and people wrapped in neoprene, snorkels and visions of what is beneath the surface; as a non-swimmer I am content with a more than ample view of what is above the surface

I usually walk much earlier to observe scenery, marvel at the waves lapping at my feet and to experience the quiet magnificence of this place where sky, ocean and lava have melded natural beauty as its own art form, meant for just me but I am happy to share it with everyone

my timing today offered a different brand of site-seeing observations- this beach crowd provided ample people watching opportunities; the divisions of the population falling into two groups no matter what your vantage point; the pale first day types like me and the ‘last day here’ types, each impatiently squeezing every ounce of value from the experience; barrel chested young men and those who’s barrels have slipped a foot or two; honeymooners and non-honeymooners, those who’ve had several honeymoons and those who’ve never had one; classic beauties and worn out-beaters (sound like car references), those with I-pods, those without; those in pairs, those alone; those without an agenda, those without a care; those who say good morning, those who don’t; those on their cell phones, those not; those wonderful gardening staff who manicure the grounds of hotels and high-end condos and those who wish those guys worked in Omaha or Saskatoon or wherever home is; those identified by age, not vocation, those with a new lease on life, those whose lease is running out; couples bickering (yes, bickering), those who left their stress points behind

a few people walk dogs, most don’t; some were little lap-dog runabouts, the best were the hard to control big pups . . challenging for their owners, reminiscent of Gusta who would go nuts in this place

for the benefit of the men in my audience – I must tell you the scenery is a mix of all shapes, some with after-market equipment from silicon valley (though any similarity to a Victoria Secret fashion show would be very much overstating the case); for observers of the female form the wide variety of sport/jogging/work-out clothing gives new meaning to the term ‘asset management’ if you catch my drift; size 2 is scrumptious no matter what but some larger bodies are only heavenly if the round shapes are held reasonably in place; in any case, the observing can cause neck strain or back difficulties for the watcher to say nothing of the impact on the ‘vacation athletes’ themselves

my back and neck could sure use a massage (I'll blame 2 long plane rides!), but first order of business is to get organized, book some tee-times, make some calls and augment my stock of groceries hastily picked up last night (NEVER shop when you are hungry they say)

first unwind day is beginning its unwind nicely

on the other hand, I am not sure if it is time for lunch or a nap . . oh well . .

aloha,

Mark
337,660
205.5

Aloha, my friend, AW, Calgary

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Have a great trip Mark. The passion in your words leading up to this trip are inspiring. I hope the sun and golf god's smile on you every day! Regards, MW, Calgary

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my eyes are green with envy., MM, Edmonton

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Alohaaa! Welcome to paradise where the sun shines, palm trees sway and miles of sandy beaches await your every pleasure. Cherish every moment - I know you will. See you when you return - unless some island lass turns your head, GT, Calgary

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Hi Mark What a perfect day to leave on your holiday.....sure is white here. Hope you have a great time in Maui. Kick back, relax, golf, bikini watch..... See you when you get back, EK, Calgary

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[written & published at Delta Hotel, Calgary International Airport]

-4C/26F, steady breeze, it snowed all night . . just stopped now . . brrrr; my walk [indoors because my coat is in my car in the parking structure], laps the length of the terminal on both levels revealed activity like an amusement park in preparation for the day’s patrons – floor washers, ‘slept in my clothes on a bench’ types and early risers jockeying for line-up spots between at 4:30AM were each available in quantity

snow overnight makes my ‘stay at the airport’ choice look good right now; I will be on time for a 6AM check in, the Delta stay was pleasant, room service was tasty; the gym downstairs was deserted as I rode the stationary bike to nowhere; my stop in Los Angelas will be cool (currently 42F) but Maui’s forecast is ‘mostly sunny with isolated showers, highs around 81 at the shore, east winds around 10 mph, chance of rain 20%’ is quite encouraging

Gusta is kenneled – she went wild arriving there yesterday; many thanks to everyone for their WARM wishes . .

“All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveler is unaware.” – Martin Buber

a beautiful day is beginning

I must go check in for my flight . . aloha

Mark
337,684

205.5

Have a wonderful vacation. May your days be filled with sunshine and laughter, and may you hit that little dimpled white ball as straight as an arrow...enjoy Mark! I will think of you as I am in Toronto on Thursday & Friday, Saskatoon on Monday, Edmonton on Tuesday and Vancouver next Friday. I am rolling out a new program so I am taking "the show on the road" so to speak. Take care!, BP, Cochrane

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Aloha, have a great time. Hugs, MM, Edmonton

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Good morning Mark, You sent something but it was blocked. Can you resend it toXXXXX, Thanks Mark!, DBB, Calgary

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Mark, I hope you have a wonderful holiday! I envy you going to Maui. I was there about 20 years ago and I’m sure it’s changed tremendously since then, SB, Calgary

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The sights and sounds of Maui await you. Aloha, Mark. I agree with MW – share your feelings with those you care about now – all of us could be gone in an instant!, B?, Calgary

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hello mark...........i have been 'walkabout' again, this time to saskatchewan and manitoba, but more than happy to be back in alberta, ...........been catching up with some really great musings, u put into such wonderful words what i so often think and feel.............didn't want u to go without saying 'bon voyage'............may your trip be everything u anticipate, after all, that is half the fun!.........and nothing quite like having a most favourite place in the world that u can revisit time and again knowing u will find your solace and recharge there ..........enjoy!........, CG, Morningside . . . ps.......i know it's belated, but thank u so much for taking time out to meet me and for the coffee on boxing day,........ loved our conversation , thank u for all your input and advice, was hard to let u go!

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Enjoy Maui! You deserve the "time out"!, SM, Calgary

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Have fun honey…. I am jealous. Looking forward to hearing about the beach walks, DB, Red Deer

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Bon Voyage, Enjoy!!!! Should be very interesting your "musings" from your Paradise found! I enjoy these every day, so glad you will still be sending them out while on vacation, I have been collecting from your musings individual phrases ... thoughts ... your words of inspiration and amazing how when they are all put together in one document, how thought provoking they are, and what a good read. you pushed a button with me on Dec 7th, Congratulations for your anniversary!!! (also my birthday), and then another huge button with the talk of not being afraid of dead ends, blind alleys and sharp cliffs ... and most recently the space between death and defeat - decisions, and I am laughing right along with you! that is of course when I am not absolutely terrified of the aforementioned cliffs, etc! But importantly I have not lost my passion for words or life or information and the excitement of something new to learn that is when I know it is a good day, when I have learned something new! You should be charging for these words of wisdom, I look forward to your collection of the best! Have a great one! Take care, A?, Calgary

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Mahalo for sharing. Look forward to meeting you next week. I will be in Kona on 17th, in Hilo 19th but around the rest of the time. Look forward to hearing from you when you arrive on Maui No Ka Oi, PD, Lahaina

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Have a fantastic time. This must be the year of Hawaii - 6 of my friends are going to Hawaii this year and my sister is getting married in Maui as well. Synchronicity. And you were born the same year as my mom. Best wishes to Gusta - we checked out the kennel for our hairless cat, Oliver, for when we go in April, SS, Calgary

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Aloha to you, Have a wonderful time, SC, Fort Smith

-1C/31F, clearing, mild, calm, nicest morning in a quiet a while - snow and slush starting to feel like spilled slurpees underfoot; like so many times before . . teased all the way 'round the lagoon, the rabbit kept moving ahead, staying just within sniff distance driving Gusta goes a little bit nuts each time

Gusta leaves for her vacation at the pet resort in a little while; work left to do before I go has diminished to a small manageable volume for this morning, packing awaits . . computer, reading, shorts, shirts, clubs, sun-screen . . 10 minutes tops . . then I’ll be off to an airport hotel this afternoon . . . 24 hours from now I will be in the air

recent days saw many calls and notes from friends wishing me a pleasant vacation, a happy trip etc. – mostly I think they sense how much going there means to me – how incredibly special it is on my priority list: I think, how lucky I am that I can have this passion AND indulge it, each time I go there

why not indulge passions?

so many people I see around my world don’t; they work, live in homes, save, invest, raise families, have relationships - all good stuff - but so often I hear people speaking of wishes, hopes, dreams unfulfilled; I hear them say things like 'I wish I could . . .', 'I have always wanted to …..' or 'I had always wanted to do ________ but never did', or 'I can't afford to go, I have to get my teeth fixed'

if we do anything in life worth doing, I think we should INCLUDE our passions, not exclude them; if we have duties, responsibilities and obligations that is fine . . we should do them most of the time with a view to 'what would happen to those elements of my life if I wasn't here?', then make contingency plans - but NOT shelving dreams, passions or deep needs

I don’t want to go on this trip, I don’t have to go on this trip; I choose to go on this trip and the moment I get there I will be planning the next one and the moment I get back I will be thinking about it – not to the exclusion of many important things – but by making sure I don’t forget how important it is each time

I find myself burning to get back to Maui, not just for the break from winter, the great golf, the pleasure of palm trees and easy walking beaches, not just for the humidity, the warmth of the air, the kindness of people made gentle by that incredible place - but because I feel gentle there, each time

I've read of Gaugin's tumultuous life, finally finding all his 'ingredients' in one place - a paradise called Tahiti only to die there, far to youn at 54, but having relished that experience and having done his greatest work there where he found such glorious inspiration

I read Mark Twain’s praise each time he visited Hawaii and of his sadness not getting back there again late in his life

“Life is like a song, you have to enjoy it while it plays because you never know if it will come on again.” - Eugène Henri Paul Gauguin

someone asked the other day, if I am now or have experienced a mid-life crisis

I answered that I’ve not hit that bump in my road, but I feel my visits to Maui are certainly preventing me from having one, each time I go there

self indulgent, you bet

worth every moment, every dollar, all the time

each time

not Paradise Lost, but PARADISE FOUND, each time

Mark
337,708
205.8

I receive your "musings" every morning and while I sometimes I go speedreading very quickly through, I always note what your Gusta is doing -- love dogs and thought that there are few precious ones in this set of photos -- I tend to do the "aah" thing at the puppies -- little bugs and pigs leave me cold but there you go -- Enjoy Hawaii -- hope your flight provides you some "ZZZZZZZZZZZ" time, SB, ?

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Happy New Year Mark! Very touching muse today. After 20 years, I still cherish memories of my Dad every day as he was my inspiration in business and in life. If he were still here, he would say in his best John Wayne imitation, "move 'em along" and I guess we all do. Take advantage of the time while it's there. Cheers and swing sweetly in Hawaii!, JD, Vancouver

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Your Musings today hit home for me. I have been thinking a lot about my Dad lately. Next month will be 10 years since he's "been gone", and I think of him everyday. But specifically to your comments about him struggling with saying something affectionate really hit home. My Dad was like that as well, but I had made a conscious choice to tell him how I felt about him before that final day arrive. It was uncomfortable at first, but after some time, it got easier...for both of us. We ended every conversation (he lived out of town so our conversations were mostly on the phone) with some form of verbal affection for each other. When the end did finally come, my siblings and I were lucky enough to sit with my Dad and say what we needed to say to him before he passed and he was comfortable enough to share his feelings with each of us. That final conversation, although not easy, was comfortable for my Dad and I because of our previous conversations. Never, ever stop telling people how you feel about them. MW-Calgary

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Looking forward to seeing you again!, DE, Makawao