Musing

Hello Mark – I seem to having fallen off your distribution list. Can you re-add me? Thanks, MK, Calgary

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RE: keep the change – Couldn’t help thinking that this http://video.stumbleupon.com/#p=ithct48cqw is tied to the musing before this one. It is a very interesting speech that Everyone should see, and practice. Speaking of change,,, I have moved to Century 21 to be with some. Old friends in the business, and further my quest of doing better at real estate. Blessings to you and all your readers. DM, Red Deer, AB

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And don't forget the bearing of a beautiful woman with a well-balanced hat (or distinctive man), or child-bearing or bearing guilt....I could go on....The versatility of our language is amazing. Even if two people are looking in the same direction they will not necessarily see the same things; sometimes preconceived ideas have influences on what we see. I remember hearing the story many years ago of an observer and a scientist looking at a flock of sheep. "Look at that flock of white sheep," said the observer. "Yes," the scientist replied, "They appear to be, from this side." EG, Calgary

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -11C/12F, overcast, fog with a few snow flakes falling; walks melted yesterday so walking was easy – eerie feeling knowing the entire world is bathed in sunshine yet a layer or warm air meeting cold air can keep everything from view, make it hard to get one’s bearings

“Last week the candle factory burned down. Everyone just stood around and sang Happy Birthday.” – Stephen Wright

seeing the butterfly is easy, but looking in the same direction the butterfly is going remains a mystery to be discovered, albeit slowly; seeing what I want, wanting what I see; the fog analogy fits too for that situation when one can see clearly looking forward, another seeing clearly looking back – but not until two people are looking in the same direction can they determine if they see the same things

“Vision is the art of seeing what is invisible to others.” – Jonathan Swift

seeing, having vision – parts of discovery – like bearings we never see in a car, by no means the whole experience but an incredibly important part of enjoying a smooth ride; bearing gifts, bearing burdens . .

I may lose my way but certainly I’ll not lose my bearings; happy b-day PB

Mark Kolke
339,088
199.0

Hi Mark: Hope all is well with you & yours. One of the things I enjoy most about your writing is your clever use of analogy. You have literary magic. Fondly, JH, Kelowna, BC

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Being caught in the centre of the story and sensing the ending without having completed the journey// could lead to a sharp downfall, something you seem to have a problem with. Are you being to literal in your thought process of the butterfly?//Ease back on that accelerator you don't leap from the hopper to the butterfly and back to the hopper too quickly without a fear of capture by a predator. "T" Here at Home, WT, Calgary

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Grasshoppers turn into butterflies?? (They wish) For a butterfly, as for us, there is yesterday and today, but not necessarily tomorrow. We do our best to survive and enjoy, but can we ever be sure? In life, stand-still does not last very long, only for humming-birds; we go forward or back, if just within a range. Our stories are all interesting, EG, Calgary

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today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -9C/16F, overcast, lots of damp fresh snow – still falling – everything pure and clean; footing uncertainty my top priority, while Gusta felt everything needed a sniff because stuff could be anywhere - sharp contrast to yesterday’s sojourn at the off-leash area of interesting terrain, of dips, turns and paths

I empathize with the plight of the male butterfly; he knows but does not fully understand the beautiful creature he is pursuing – but his life is short, no idea when weather or seasons will change – but, for a short while in the life of this planet, he wants to wake up every morning knowing that he will bed down next to her that night; I think it is a small thing to grant the butterfly – he works hard, cares, makes genuine effort to be a good butterfly (yet he makes no apology for having lived a checkered life of a grasshopper too); he brings diversification and variety that make him a little goofy but sometimes fun to be with (I am wondering too if the ‘Flight of the Bumblebee’ was really intended to be the ‘Plight of the Bumblebee’ for I am sure all frisky species must have this in common

my destination is not a place or places or many places – it is a province of peace, a state of mind, of being found and found out and where we are is right here right now and nothing else matters anywhere close to this anywhere in life in any place (mind you, everything’s nicer in Maui)

I think it matters as much to men and women, but in my experience it seems women talk about it more; being sure of a big thing or of the many tiny things that make up its whole seems to be something worthy of thought and consideration – it seems logical, thoughtful and worthy - that is the process called ‘being sure’

emotion, feeling, wishing and desiring must have a place amongst the details – there has to be time for wanting, space for randomness and room for error; old thoughts and new thoughts collide, ideas interfere with issues – the conundrum of figuring out what comes next, what comes after that and where that leads

simply put, with a definable destination and a choice of traveling companion, the consternation is in finding the combination of dips, turns and paths to get there; so it would seem, in relationships there is a familiar process – a discussing of issues, making plans to be sure but there is the part that comes before the making of the plans

in recent days, and coming ones too, discussion will take place in my life not unlike discussions in many relationships - that point of go forward, go backward or stand-still – when those seem to be the three available options; confounding a bit for me because I feel like a story teller, writing it down, where I’ve found my happy ending - but it’s only the middle of the story

Mark Kolke
339,112
196.8

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

On March 29th, 2008, the impact of this single hour won’t be mind blowing, it really isn’t that radical but like most change, it is a seed, an idea, a belief. When we were kids in the 60’s, would you have believed the Berlin Wall would come down or an African American would be president of the US? Would you believed that smoking would be outlawed in a bar? These changes didn’t happen in one hour! I’m looking forward to March 29th, 2018/2028…... Have to go, need to turn my lights off, DL, Calgary

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When a tree falls and no one is in the forest, there is no sound. Sound is a sensory response in the brain to a neurological stimulant received through the vibration of the eardrum, caused by the sound wave transmitted via the energy emitted during the fall of the tree. No newspaper does not mean no news, even with newspaper, it does not necessarily cover news. Turning off the light does not imply no power, but that the power is not delivered to your light. Events can have very simplistic explanations. Life can be as simple as being born, breathing, eating, metabolizing, then "drop dead". JT, Calgary

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I think that turning off the lights, computer and TV for an hour WILL make a difference, if only to cause us to ponder what it would be like without these conveniences, and causing us to contemplate our energy use, its finiteness in present modalities, and what our use of it might affect our future (I'm not yet convinced that our contribution to global warming is that significant, as some renegade scientists aren't, but I know that oil and gas, coal and uranium supplies are finite), EG, Calgary

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today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -6C/22F, streets absent activity, dull, overcast, some snow flakes blowing about, Gusta happy and hungry

if a tree falls in a forest when no one is there, does it make a noise? . . if the paper doesn’t show up, was there any news? . . if the lights go out, does that mean we have no power?

big things make a difference – so some folks think – but I don’t agree; little things get me up, get me down, inspire me, frustrate me or act as catalysts for change - thinking about change does little; changing thinking has a better chance

media are hyping an idea (must be a slow news day) about an hour of darkness this evening – promoted worldwide, more energy will likely be used planning and promoting than will be saved by turning off lights for an hour

while those of us with a romantic bent may plan dinner by candlelight, power plan operators will cringe to see consumption drop suddenly while they keep producing; while the notion of reduced consumption and a reduced carbon footprint should be on all our minds I don’t think a media event or mass action for 1 hour will change much – because the entire developed world does not think about how to save a tree or kill-a-watt, we expect lights to come on when we flip a switch; we don’t deposit a quarter or spare a thought – we just count on it to always be there, like water in the tap or an appliance the works when we need it; when it doesn’t we freak out a little

what changes the way we behave are events and emotions; fear, joy, tragedy, hope – motivate us to change our actions but do those changes take? . . are the motivating factors temporary, are the affects lasting?

I’m not sure if our day will involve hunkering down under a good light to read a book, a drive in the country, dining by candlelight or turning down the thermostat – but for now we’ll just grit our teeth (and I’ll go out to get one) because the Saturday morning paper (&!@%+!%*)did not show up

Mark Kolke
339,136
194.3

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Hey Mark, I work in Largo not Key largo big difference. It just outside Tampa, Florida and borders Clearwater - not way south in the Keys. Come for a visit sunny and 79 again today. Can Gusta swim, LOL I live on the gulf of Mexico, AN, Largo, FL

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Hi Mark, One of your readers has been forwarding your musings to me and I would appreciate being added to your distribution list. XXXXX Thanks, JD, ?

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You touch upon the whole of human experience in a poetic manner; isn't that what people like Chaucer, Shakespeare, Whitman and Frost have tried to do? The perpetual spinning of the world and our experiences in it, and the unfolding of the universe are taking place no matter what we do, whether it's nothing, lying on our backs in a warm meadow contemplating the clouds, or our most strenuous efforts at success or bare survival. We are not conscious of every thing that is, or happens, EG, Calgary

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today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -7C/19F, clear, half-moon remnant hangs awkwardly as sunrise light bounces off rooftops, old-route by the school revisited today; Gusta behaving better on-leash and upon returning – waiting at the door for her paws to be wiped, still shedding profusely

be prepared to stop, be prepared to pause, be prepared to go, be prepared for anything,
be prepared for something, be prepared for nothing - life is flying without a net, it is a mix of reality and imagination, a mix of luck and planning, of actions and reactions, of help and of helplessness

someone joked that in the case of a falling elevator it was not the ride you worry about but the sudden stop – amusing quip, unless you are getting into an elevator at the time; this Friday, today – week’s end, weekend’s beginning - first or last day of an incalculable number of things when millions will ride elevators safely through many stops; what are you prepared for - a sudden stop, a sprint for fun or an opportunity to change something?

sometimes traffic signs are just traffic signs; sometimes they arrest attention and divert thought; yesterday as I drove home from a meeting I came upon one that said ‘be prepared to stop’ – impact - not just to slow me to avoid a construction crew collision, but rather a collision of ideas in my head, semiotics in action

yesterday several people helped me in ways I didn’t expect and I helped some people in ways they were unprepared for; pleasant surprises are so much easier than scary ones but looking back on this handful of happenings, a collection of unconnected events I ought to have known, I ought to have been prepared to know that these chance moments – choice moments – were worth stopping for, not to slow me down or speed me up, but to remind me that I always need to be prepared to stop

depending on how I see change, or sea-change, making change can be conclusion of a store purchase or something else entirely depending on what I want to see and depending on whether I am prepared to stop

either way, I’ll keep the change

Mark Kolke
339,160
194.4

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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RE: subject to change/I'm percolating; Hi Mark – your message is very appropriate today for me (as indeed they are on many days). Tonight I will be presenting my vision for long-term housing for adults who live with autism. I am percolating with ideas, as I have been for many years, but now the first draft is on paper; people are listening; a small group of interested parties are meeting tonight. However, I need to be aware that my “perfect” vision will be subject to change by the end of the evening. Collaboration is good – as the “I” changes to “we”. I too travel from fright to euphoria…hoping to land somewhere safe in between. Once details are more formalized, I’ll want your reliable input, as I have asked for over the last 20 years. Cheers, S #3, SA, Edmonton, AB

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Please change my e-mail address to XXXXX Thank you, MH, ?

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How true! Live life as it comes, with its infinite variety without prior notice. Regarding the inconvenience you refer to, it is only that, an inconvenience, not a threat like "The Inconvenient Truth." I like the idea of emotional states represented by towns. I wonder what the people living in them feel like. Perhaps they have adapted; it's possible to do. EG, Calgary

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today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -6C/21F, overcast, no snow but that could be subject to change; frozen gravel was good traction for me as we alley-walked this morning - sniffing winter’s residue was entertaining for Gusta plus she found several new friends, safely on their side of the fence, barking wildly - walking quickly past fences provides a slo-mo movie of every backyard

I’m charged up this morning – fresh ideas percolating, building something, re-inventing something, writing something, deals-on-the-go, hectic morning schedule dictates brevity – all of which could be subject to change in a heartbeat

I have a dream life which could all change without notice as does anything I think is certain; but who wants a life without dreamy stimulation, who wants slo-mo? I have more problems and issues in the fire than most people I know – but compared to the alternatives of life, death, health, sickness – I’ll take what I have and love it because it is all subject to change without notice; this morning I am inconvenienced by the need to take my vehicle for a repair estimate (I got rear-ended a couple of weeks ago) – this is a royal pain of inconvenience, but considering some people suffer horrid injuries in car crashes while they were just minding their own business, I don’t mind so much having this inconvenience

that which does not serve to connect us, serves to divide us - life as we know it, dream it, wish it, love it or hate it is subject to change without notice; the certainty we knew only moments ago might evaporate moments from now; when I put my head around that idea, depending on my mood or emotional state at the time, I travel in a heartbeat from fright to euphoria – like they are towns by those names

I prefer to live between them

Mark Kolke
339,184
195.8

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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You are having a carnal relationship with words; They explain every thing they describe every thing they're what you live for, they are your true love. "T", WT, Calgary

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One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well that the farmer had accidentally left uncovered. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway, so it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off! Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up, AN, Key Largo, FL

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Re: peaceful moments - There is a saying, that I generally respect, about going where angels fear to tread....... but having been in distress myself with a different generation.....here is another idea, if old hat just forget it. As an adult I found that looking at the pressures on me at the time provided some insight into my evaluations of my parents as a teen and pre-teen. Part of my evaluations of parents were a product of pressures from environments out of the home. I was too young to realize that my parents were not aware of the pressures. My parents had a rude awakening about those pressures some 6-7 years later, and as a young adult I found that very entertaining, and enlightening too since they were largely unaware of how my environment evaluated people. But that was in a context of a good relationship with my parents overall, and in the context that the general community around me believed that my parents were successes, LHE, Calgary

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -9C/17F, clear, sun rising - chilled cheeks pressed into the breeze at a quickened pace (Gusta welcomed that) as my ankle recovery progresses; a Mallard got a grip on a high spot to roost, guard-like atop a steep roof, waiting for some potential mate to communicate I suppose

no more a day of ‘new approach’ as it is one of ‘old approach’ - issues need to be tackled and solutions found; I tend to push hard to get things done for clients while at the same time I often push aside troublesome issues, to be dealt with later of course, and later, and later still when later arrives, sometimes with a thud; business is steady, some ‘sure things’ that never were did not come to fruition and some great things are just taking a lot longer than expected – couple that with more optimism than I ought to have sometimes and it makes for difficult challenges; chickens (or maybe ducks) come home to roost

today, as they all are, is a choice day; choice as in primo-fantastico, choice as in a series of decisions on how to move forward, backward or just to stand still; I’ve made a lot of changes in activity/focus/goals over the last year - clearly I need more; taking time for things I’ve been postponing/neglecting has been a focus these last few months; teeth, health and the condition of my feet for starters but also re-focusing on core business, reducing the breadth of focus to concentrate more effectively on those things which generate the best opportunities, best revenue and cutting costs of things I cannot afford – maybe it is the weather – maybe it is facing challenging elements of reality

I get impatient when things do not come to fruition as quickly as I want, frustrated when things I’ve counted on fail to materialize and the knocking on the door is not a new opportunity but a chicken coming home to roost; some things get me up, others beat me down – abundant obstacles, whirl-of-day easily creates a mirage to confuse the mix of best opportunities, best route to go, right thing to do – of owning truth and its consequences

the inexorable pace of nature teaches a steady relentless unwavering consistent pace is the way the world works – notwithstanding the pace of nano-seconds flying around – the stage of life I am at, if I listen to advertising, ought to be for slowing down; whether or not this is an ‘unfortunate’ circumstance, I need to work, work hard, go hard and not give up because I don’t have a pile of money or pile of plans to get some . . so working rather than easy retirement is my next phase of life; in many respects I believe this is good but not without its problems, choices and consequences – this is truth

in writing a speech recently I made reference to ‘pivotal moments’ in life as ones we often see clearly, but only in retrospect; sometimes though I think we can see and feel them happening; today feels like one of those, not for solving everything or anything, but for pivoting

Mark Kolke
339,208
197.4

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Finally I have managed to make my time to drop you some lines today and say, all your “wonderful master piece” of daily musing has been highly appreciated personally by me. I do enjoy reading them and believe in your talent (you are gifted from God). Please continue doing so and I will continue being your good fan. All my best wishes, PS, China

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Hi Mark, I seem to have fallen off your list (assuming you have been issuing daily) Thanx in advance for reinstatement, HB, Calgary

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Mark, I enjoy your daily musings...always good food for thought! A while ago, my email ID was dropped from your Facility Calgary weekly report. I would really appreciate if you could put me back on you d-list. Thanks, BM, Palm Desert, CA

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today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -2C/28F, light cloud in the east, otherwise clear, calm; Gusta anxious to run, feeling restrained . . anxious to meet that Scottie off in the distance – my mind is somewhere else, I’m not paying attention to the roofer separating old shingles from their roof or the complexities of life in the houses on these streets – surely none are like mine

most things in life are choices, but we get the mother we get – no baby has a choice; safe to say that on the ‘respect and adore your mother’ scale of 1-10 that I would register minus-3; my experiences and feelings have always been far removed from what people say or write about their mothers – not that she was inhumane or neglectful in my formative years, but she left me with a legacy of being more like her than I can easily acknowledge

difficult things don’t scare me, near-impossible challenges intrigue me, but this one I find impossible to extricate myself from its clutches; like fingerprints or snowflakes, there are no two mothers alike and probably no two mother-child relationships alike

two kinds of mothers populate the world – our own and everyone else’s; mine - peculiar, unique and yet probably not that different from her genre; born in the 20s, experienced a depression, a world war, product of her homesteading family, raising kids in the 50s; unread, unschooled and unprepared – but was she truly unprepared for motherhood or just unprepared for someone like me?

elements of me are like her, others - I am absolutely opposite, revelations of how much I wanted to be different – but wait, what I really wanted was for her to be different; so few peaceful moments – angst and argument would not let them in; I’ve examined my inventory of failed relationships – wondering if I have too often mixed unresolved ‘mother’ issues with the process, looking too hard for someone unlike her enough to be ‘great by definition’ or someone more like her so I can toil in futility to ‘get it right’ with someone else - hopeless question with no hope of a satisfying answer

a counselor coached me to work things out myself as it become clear I could not work things out ‘with her’; that worked in a perverse way for a couple of years but we would still get into a hissing match now and then – then we had an uneasy truce for a few years, but for the last nine years it has become more one-sided (as the counselor encouraged)

I’ve worked on this relationship alone; at times enlightening when I’ve had some very productive conversations with my dad that have added perspective – we’ve talked lots – but mostly it has been a perverse mix of understanding some things better mixed with ‘never understanding’ others; some are questions I could never ask her or, when I have, I can never get a satisfying answer – none have produced a peaceful moment

nine years ago this morning I saw her laying there – oxygen tube gone, room quiet, chest motionless – not breathing, talking or railing against life, her body surrendered to silence of death; I don’t remember – ever – a more peaceful moment with her; certainly there have not been any between us since

Mark Kolke
339,232
196.8

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Hello Mark, I do enjoy reading your daily musings, although I wish to only receive one per day. It appears I am on two lists. Thank you kindly, DP, Waltham, MA

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You're right, no one can be prepared for everything that drops on their plate. That fact makes life far more interesting. In children it's the answer to the problem: "Mommy, I'm bored.", EG, Calgary

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I go into St. Mike's tomorrow to have a new hip made. I will be out of touch for a while. I hope you all miss me. By the way, there have been very few comments on my postings. Is it because you can't find them or just that you have nothing to say. Log in to larrysolway.blogspot.com While I am lying on my bed of pain I will give more thought to being productive and involved when retired. A lot of it is in my book Blind Sided By Retirement. It is supposed to be available at Chapters. If not, Amazon is listing it. Meanwhile - ciao for now, LS, Toronto

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today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -3C/24F, low overcast, a damp snowy blanket stopped short of being offensive – a push back – nature reminds me summer is still three months away; we walked the alleys to find traction, Gusta turning up a little gravel doing wind sprints

Get Ready – is more than a song title (Temptations did it, Rare Earth did it better)- but that beat plays in my head when I think about it; I like the building tempo or is that tempo building?

I’ve spent my entire life hurrying – rushing – just to get to today, getting ready for today, prepared for today – so I think I can handle anything today might bring - all I can do is to be prepared to be unprepared; being ready to be sharp is not the same as being sharp – it is more like being an intellectual Maytag man . . sitting around, waiting to be ready with a solution if the phone rings; I try to use something I’ve learned (and taught) in my Toastmasters life with respect to impromptu speaking – that of being ready to react to something I’m not expecting

Monday morning is the beginning for some, the end for some; like the ambience in a room before a special dinner, before an occasion, is very similar – mood has direct impact on outcome, on whether or not desired results are achieved

a week is like that – the beginning of a good day deserves a good breakfast and the beginning of a good day/week deserves an inspired beginning; I can’t recall the last time a work day did not provide a ringing phone with a stranger on the other end of the line asking me if I could help with something I’d not done before or presenting a new problem

you can’t prepare for that – just be ready to enjoy it when it happens – the choice to be ready or not automatic; it is a conscious awareness, a preparedness, anticipating whatever might come (hopefully with a broad grin), so get ready

Mark Kolke
339,256
199.0

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Albeit a bit late, Happy Easter to you and PB. Wishing both of happiness along your crooked path but a deserved togetherness, CB, Calgary

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I haven't received any Musings for a few days now. Have you forgotten me? Regards, HV, Toronto, ON

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You have outdone yourself today! Great thoughts and feelings laid brilliantly on canvas! The people I want to spend time with are always my kin in thought, feeling, expression or curiosity. It's all in the perspective, EG, Calgary

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today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -8C/17F Chinook arch looming, early light wraps light clouds in a layer of dusty soft orange/pink; Gusta pulling less hard it seems – it must be the new heavy-duty leash that lessens the pull on my infrastructure

how do you find the people you spend time with?

I want clarity, I want thought, I want something stimulating to think about or I want lots of laughter to balance it out, I want to find equilibrium - otherwise I probably appear disinterested (because I am) which can alienate people or make them hard to get to know – sometimes precluding getting to know them at all well, ever

“Although our intellect always longs for clarity and certainty, our nature often finds uncertainty fascinating.” – Karl von Clausewitz

day of preparation, 4-5 hours of grazing/visiting, 20something was the headcount; my dad got to meet many of PB’s extended family for the first time – fun to witness - lots of smiles, laughs, great food contributions added to the mix; roasted pork loin was good, ham was better (my ham glaze rocked), cream corn (recipe from Lawry’s in Las Vegas) sold well, the braided bread and baked apples garnered smiles + 4 birthday cakes were set ablaze; then, just as swiftly as yesterday’s family Easter-feaster/birthday dinner came together, it went

getting to know people I see little of in rather artificial situations (ie: the family gathering) is difficult; lots to observe - no history, no idea, no warning labels, no way to know who I’ll like in time, or who I won’t, no idea who will grow close, no idea who will be unreachable or impossible – for now I’ll stay with ‘herding cats’ as most apropos label; there is no depth, no discussion that intrigues, superficial pleasantries, laughter, food, a sense of occasion – but little deep learning - though observing interactions is often educational, enlightening or downright bizarre

yesterday capped a year that began (this day a year ago) when I met PB for the first time; a year ago I thought I saw a butterfly, a pretty butterfly - then I wasn’t so sure for a long while; I attended a morning presentation and luncheon where we chatted and I got her card – I called the following day but it would be three months of stalling before she would actually have a date with me; intermittent communication over time, we each had other business to finish I suppose, but in time we got it together . . so much to reflect upon

a year is both a long time or short time – it depends on perspective; a year to live sounds tragic, but ‘a year of finding clarity amid fascinating uncertainty’ is a year of living gloriously

To: PB, clarity is something I still seek – after a year I’m getting to know you – the path will surely be crooked and long, too hard to see the length and breadth of it yet but I know we have a shared desire to find equilibrium, to have clarity, to laugh, to be stimulated – I find the uncertainty both fascinating and stimulating

Mark Kolke
339,280
198.5

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Each of us makes our daily bread – glad to have you as one of my ingredients! A bit of yeast, perhaps?, BL, Great Falls, MT

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Our cat Murphy kneads our bed, and sometimes whatever material is spread across our laps....What feeling motivates this I do not know, but there seems to be something loving about it, like your crafting your bread. Creativity is as you say a living, but also a loving, thing. It is an exercise of the psyche, mediated through the physical functions, EG, Calgary

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -3C/26F, clear, calm; a full moon hung on in the west, like a picture askew on a wall waiting to be taken down as first light lifted the east horizon to our view; Gusta spent an hour trying to sever my left rotator cuff while I acted as a stumbling anchor on our first really long walk in weeks, all we saw is drab but anticipating change, in need of a cold spring shower

winter marches to an end in search of its enchanted April so that May will follow, as spring shades winter’s grime away– drabness of reality aside - I see brightness, light and sizzle for what they might compose – new season’s sinewy muscles wrestling, wildly abandoning a grimy winter palate, aching to romp between sheets of rain when it comes – carnal and raw

“Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.” – William Shakespeare

working for dough took on new meaning; a Challah recipe on cooks.com and U-tube tutorial on 6-strand braiding were my inspiration, ingredients at hand, spatulas and bowls were simply accessories; working dough is for the hands, dough is a live thing in knead of form, I kneaded it yesterday; first loaf (all 3 dogs liked it) was tasty but under-baked and doughy while the second loaf is firm, its rich darker color looks great – it rests in anticipation of being spread apart and devoured at dinner this evening

not too late I suppose to be student of this craft – or maybe I’m doing OK without the confines of ‘how things should be done’ - art of prose, mechanics of poetry, learning of form, scholarship of literature – have not eluded me as much as I avoided them – not that I steered away, I was never steered toward it; like yeast laden dough I am a live thing, in search of new form, addictively drinking creative juice I crave from life’s fruit

I wasn’t steered at all; not pointed – maybe there is value in that, to go in many directions without a map, without purpose – in time, finding a way, finding a purpose, like water, sugar and flour find their way into dough, put together – then taken apart in lumps to be shaped into a new form for baking; along the path, something alive and rising, time to knead like bread when needed, punching it down, letting it rise up and then forming it carefully before baking

creativity, like dough, is a living thing; notes on paper, notations on screen, on paper or floating in head swirl – eddy-like for me, the same water in and out, forth and back again – juicy mess massaged and made whole or splashed spectacularly on this canvas, a loaf made of life slices

Mark Kolke
339,304
198.4

... with your voice, teach in order to learn

What do you think? Join the discussion - comments are welcomed - please write.

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

You know how you've impacted my life, Mark, and I'm privileged to count myself among your legions of "witnesses." Keep on writing - and I'll expect a signed copy of the book (I'll buy it!), when it's on the shelves, CB, Calgary

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Keep the musings coming. I may be silent but the musings still valuable to me internally, BT, Calgary . . P.S: It’s my way of staying in touch with you as you were there for me when we needed your services.

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Happy Easter Mark, Cheers, NB, Calgary

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In the interest of not staying silent, here’s a simple (and impressive) bread recipe! http://www.motherearthnews.com/Easy-No-Knead-Bread-Video.aspx , SF, Philadelphia, PA

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I have thoroughly enjoyed your musings for a year and a half now. Your insights to life as one voice have echoed many of my own experiences but I am not a writer so for me to write something it takes me a while. Keep up the excellent work, and I always look forward to your “Musings”, MN, Edmonton

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Thank you for continuing to send your 'musings'. I admit to being one of 'the silent ones'. Sometimes I don't take the time to read each, sometimes I don't allow myself time for this kind of reflection. Your words do reach me when I do take the time. Please keep on writing, TF, Calgary

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Mark, as one of those silent ones I would like to thank you. Your daily pop up on my computer screen at the beginning of my day often causes me to put on hold the regular routine of going thru, sorting, deleting, saving, responding to emails and spend a few minutes looking at your thoughts, picturing your dog by the edge of the reservoir running and playing with the other dogs and often gives my day a different perspective than I originally had. There are some days with people lined up at my door I have to file the email into your folder but I generally do come back to read it at some point thru the day and it does seem relevant to me. We met at my office many years ago in our boardroom. My boss was looking for some exposure for our newly built terminal and he asked my to join him in a meeting with you. I don't believe much came out of that as we all get busy and there is always a new priority but the addition of me to your musings has been something that I value. I will keep an eye open and give you a tap on that car window when I see you as Woodbine is just up the road in this small world. . All the best. Happy Easter & keep an eye on that bread, AG, Calgary

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In the spirit of Easter and renewal, refreshement and regeneration I offer this from a few years back.: Please don’t regret a thing you’ve done nor words that slipped around your tongue.

Take back no steps that made your way
Or acts that led you toward today.

This is the place to stop and stand
Now is the only time at hand.

Upon this moment focus your will
To the present time when you still

Know each second is new and true
And in this minute forgiveness renewed.

Pause to experience each heartbeat
And know your innocence is complete.

Happy spring, CH, Chimacum, WA

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Hey Mark..... It's your "day off" so here's a brief diversion for you while you're making bread. Test your reaction time with this special test. Click: http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/sleep/sheep/
Not easy but it is fun. Enjoy your day!, TL, Calgary

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I haven't had home-baked bread since childhood, but remember how great it tastes when fresh. My favorite these days is Cob's farmer's coarse loaf (also bought some chocolate hot cross buns and my usual blueberry Danish yesterday). Acquaintances, and sometimes friends, do come and go for all kinds of reasons; they change, we change; they move, we move; or we simply no longer have time for each other, which is the most unfortunate. Lives shared are lives enriched and better understood, EG, Calgary

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When a question is thrown out there into cyber space; only those in tune with the cosmos will attempt a reply. Weird Dude. "T" Here at Home, WT, Calgary

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Mark’s Musing today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

distribution of Musings through our list-service provider has resumed, glitches sorted out, still much to re-work rebuilding the data and re-sorting lists but ‘resumption’ of publication today makes me happy

walk report: -1/30F, brilliant sun crept over rooftops while we walked; not-working-today types sleeping in, bird chirps and garbage truck machinery the only sound, Gusta was calm for a change

good day, good Friday and - for many - a Good Friday; my project du jour is to bake bread (I’ve never done that before) for a dinner PB and I are hosting tomorrow (20 hungry people) - little silence

to those who remain silent, who never write, never call, never come by to visit – please, on this day, do this: if musings has meant something to you, if any of the spokes on our marvelous wheel of conversation has engaged your brain more productively, touched your funny bone or your heart, please don’t always be silent

my experience, five years now, spilling this ink on paper daily has taught me more than the previous fifty-one; it has built me up, knocked me down to size, amazed, enlightened, shocked, disappointed, hurt, angered and brought joy – to me and to readers – as we’ve shared our collective energy around thoughts, issues and experiences many of us share

most readers remain silent most of the time, many communicate back with me by wink, nod, phone or face-to-face - often when least expected; many times the hand of a stranger has come out of a crowd to shake mine or tap on my car window, to say ‘hey, I’m a muser’ - some have just come and gone, some have become extraordinary friends, colleagues, clients; some have become co-conspirators on projects too; others open an email each day and just come along for the ride

today begins commencement of my 6th year writing this daily column, another day of speaking my mind, asking questions, creative juice, spirited discussion and life-altering experience for me; this day six years ago there were only 8 of us – the initial group of musers – 7 of you and one of me; that day I got responses from KK, JJ, KF, MP, SC, MdP - the 7th . my daughter CK responded verbally from the next room; 100% response that first day was heartening . .and it’s been all downhill from there (too many others to thank directly today but special thanks to KT and FD for your support, mentoring and friendship)

seriously, though many hundreds have come and gone, many have stayed . . witnesses to my life, friends and supporters – your responses, feedback, critique, blasts and rebuttal have been anything but silent, have pushed me, helped me, thrilled me and, far more often than any writer ought to have, gave me a gift I could never have asked for – one I’ve been regularly and awesomely amazed by

many of you I’ve gotten to know well, others – we are new or we’ve just scratched the surface of what may become fantastic friendships, collaboration .. or spirited conflict

your gift to me has gone beyond feedback; sometimes in words typed and sent, sometimes on the phone and more often in person .. some of you have conveyed something incredible to me by telling me something I wrote, or some thinking I provoked, made a difference in your life – in that you’ve given me a gift I cannot give away or lose – perhaps some learning I re-gift from time to time with a smile on my face because you gave it to me - you had the right to remain silent but you didn’t

thanks for that

Mark Kolke
339,328
197.6

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


What do you think? Join the discussion - comments are welcomed - please write.

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Re: Smooth and enduring - ever get some of that sand in your shorts// often people you enjoy and admire can provide that same feeling; re: a bunch: that 29th day in February can set the earth off its access but only when we forget it, "T" Here at Home, WT, Calgary

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Somehow, I didn't receive the musings on March 19th, nor 20th. Please put my name back on the list, thank you, SWT,?

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Molehills do become mountains if left to fester. You should speak up (as diplomatically as possible) if something bothers you or hurts you. Sometimes, people don’t even realize that they’re doing it and it’s up to you to set them straight. If it doesn’t work out, at least you’ve spoken your mind and usually when a person does that, they don’t harbor resentment. Resentment – bad for the health. Hugs, SF, Calgary

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Re: Smooth and enduring - A beautiful thought, the oyster coating the unwelcome intruder with beautiful material. How much better would it be if we would also, when confronted with something we don't want, either reject it outright or embrace it and create something wonderful, like an improvement of our personality and understanding; re: a bunch - I read your musings every day (except yesterday when I didn't get one). As for today, I might comment that a life as a butterfly would be beautiful but brief....I know little more than that about it. I'm glad that four years ago you decided to continue with Musings, since if you hadn't I would not have had the pleasure. And it is a valuable learning experience, both in added understanding and practice in expression. The first day of Spring varies from the 20th to the 22nd. EG, Calgary

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I've missed your Musings the last two days. I'm not sure if I was removed by accident but I'd like to be added back! I thoroughly enjoy the Musings. Take care, KG, ?

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Easter this year is: Sunday March 23, 2008- As you may know, Easter is always the 1st Sunday after the 1st full moon after the Spring Equinox (which is March 20 this year). This dating of Easter is based on the lunar calendar that Hebrew people used to identify Passover, which is why it moves around on our Roman calendar. Found out a couple of things you might be interested in! Based on the above, Easter can actually be one day earlier (March 22) but that is rare. This year is the earliest Easter any of us will ever see the rest of our lives! And only the most elderly of our population have ever seen it this early (95 years old or above!). And none of us have ever, or will ever, see it a day earlier! Here's the facts: The next time Easter will be this early (March 23) will be the year 2228 (22 0 years from now). The last time it was this early was 1913 (so if you're 95 or older, you are the only ones that were around for that!). The next time it will be a day earlier, March 22, will be in the year 2285 (277 years from now). The last time it was on March 22 was 1818. So, no one alive today has or will ever see it any earlier than this year! So Have a Wonderful Easter 2008!!!, LMT, ?

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This shouldn’t be a high priority for you while you are rebuilding your mail list, but as of yesterday, your musings are full of this symbol �, from arial unicorn MS. It appears wherever you used quotes or comma or apostrophe. Somewhat disconcerting to read, but your words are worth the effort. Happy Spring! AR, Calgary

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To subscribe to Mark's Musings daily email distribution, write to mark@markmusing.com
©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -4C/25F, overcast, light breeze; faster pace than in recent days, ankle holding its own - geese and a yappy poodle heckling from a car window our audience

according the website of the North American butterfly association, a frequent question is “what is a group of butterflies called?" – the answer "a bunch"

not everyone cares, not everyone listens – what we each have to say is relevant to us but not necessarily to anyone else; that is of course until someone says ‘hey, you are that musing guy’ or words to that effect, or someone who writes to say something mattered to them or altered their experience in a meaningful way

looking back a day, a year or five years there are unquestionably too many forks in the road to mention, each contributed to my being where I am right now both physically and in this frame of mind; my experience continues to be rich and driving, my connections with spectacular people who light up rooms and my life

the first year of writing musings ended with me wrestling with ‘continue or not?’ but that silly thinking seems well in the past; as another year passes I am so grateful for those who care to read what I write which is to share what I think about; many readers write to add valuable perspective to the discussion – I still very much enjoy that

yesterday and today - thought provoking days, of new people met, of auld acquaintance not forgot; days of pondering some future directions for this daily column, of other issues too; thanks BT for your note; I enjoyed evaluating your presentation last night

unplanned forks in yesterday’s road, will alter (positively I believe) my future; others, disconcerting in the moment, won’t be important two weeks from now let alone a year from now – some are life altering events, most are not – daily circumstances and chance perversely conspire to cook up change, thoughts and creativity - the brain my cauldron, belly my thermometer

today, not tomorrow as I thought, is the first day of spring; I always thought it was the 21st; for me today is end of my winter, last day of my writing year - conclusion of 5 years of writing musings; every day I’ve walked, written and published these musings (yesterday, auspiciously, my first time not publishing the email distribution the same day thanks to some unexpected actions of my list-service provider – my list re-building starts today!)

reconstructing a mailing list is front and centre for me over the next few days – already that review is reminding me of so many people who have connected with me, people I don’t connect with as often as I should because I leave these daily missives as my primary communication vehicle with them; you are spread virtually everywhere on this planet, you have given me strength when I needed it, levity when I’ve been too full of myself and you’ve given me praise and encouragement beyond my wildest dreams – you are a bunch of butterflies . . and I thank everyone of you for coming along on my shoulder for a daily ride

Mark Kolke
339,352
196.6

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


What do you think? Join the discussion - comments are welcomed - please write.

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Hi Mark, Thanks for your insight tonight. I am sure I shall take your comments to heart when I revisit the presentation I did this evening. I will probably rework much of the piece before I do it again in public. When the rewrite has progressed would you be willing to take a look at it? I didn't say finished because that's something I find so hard. Saying "it is done". Except for cooking, then I can tell the difference between done and overdone. What I did tonight was on the rare side. Thanks also for the musings. They frequently strike a chord. I am blessed by a daily ramble with Casey the wonder dog. Usually for me in the evening. She often navigates, while I use the quiet to cogitate. Cheers, BT, Calgary


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -1C/30F, stillness everywhere – quiet, dark - early walk, ankle feeling ready for a gym visit; Gusta having difficulty seeing rabbits, their white coats now dirty beige

when irritation builds, grain of sand in an oyster shell, the oyster produces a pearl by coating that grain with something smooth, beautiful and enduring

but when irritation or conflict builds with people it is rarely pretty – swept aside or ignored, but never far from reach so the issue can be brought out to irritate some more; why is that?

a thousand tiny things – mostly pleasant, people being nice – slip from view or memory without acknowledgement, quickly forgotten, but, a slight, a hurt, an irritation . . these can take on a life of their own

time goes by, things people do (or fail to do) irritate, infuriate and downright confound; set aside or swept aside these things are put on ignore until the next occurrence, and so on – until time has passed, a hundred tiny cuts have piled onto an old wound – a mountain of resentment forms simply from an unresolved repetition of that irritation; perhaps an issue that needs resolve, that begs confrontation, or, better left in the past like a stranger ignored as we pass by

relationships - in a group, club or family – can range from comic to bizarre and back again in a single day; newcomers lack context while others have ingrained views - difficult to separate so they can catch an unfettered glimpse of a situation or person

my time spent at home, work, organization or group – more than physical sanctuary from the noisy crowd of life is less about ‘place’ than it is about a state of mind - a place of safe and warm, a place where relationships are easy and kind, irritation absent – smooth, beautiful and enduring

Mark Kolke
339,376
196.2

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


What do you think? Join the discussion - comments are welcomed - please write.

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

On our morning perambulation Muse and I met a very large coyote nose to nose - very "whack" to use the current vernacular. I am not sure if the world is particularly out of "whack" because is it not just part of the evolving pattern of life? Then there is that current expression "whack" that seems to crop up in conversation with younger people i have met. It seems to have a connotation/definition (crazy) much the same as the sentences you are using it in. But is it indeed "whack" or are we just all indulging our natural tendency to be "wacky". I recognize certain influences (media info) that create this feeling that we are off - kilter (now is that a word?) and it certainly is un-settling to read/see some of the crazy news out there. Today I am out of "whack". putting the coyote aside I have a meeting at 10:30 and I promised myself I would write 500 words before I left instead I am joining in a discussion ...... that interests me at a personal level as I ponder "wacky" most days, KS, Calgary

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So, Mark, tell us....what time do you get up and head out the door with Gusta? Enjoy your day!, TL, Calgary

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Is the world out of whack, or is it not? Who knows? By whose standards? We cannot set, or alter the laws that govern the universe; the best we can do is to interpret them to guide our decisions. That means that we can write on the blank page of life, simply put, what we can best create with the wisdom we accumulate and the inspiration we may experience. EG, Calgary

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -4C/23F, clear, calm, warming; critters out of whack - low flying pair of Canada geese nearly clipped a rooftop; Gusta tested my patience and my ankle - pulling hard to meet a fat waddling black lab, then home in time to raid someone else’s dish – she’s gold but not golden this morning

I’m not an early riser because I dislike sleep or want to avoid languishing in bed - I’m an early riser because there is too much to do and because I might miss something - if the world comes to an abrupt end, I want to be up to see it - every day, news always breaks before the dawn

complex ‘clear solutions’ where nano-speed life leaves no time for discussion, cogitation – decisions made by leaders of dubious intellect in hastily called meetings with advisors of dubious vision offer a fix often far worse than any problem - then the fix of the fixes are neither clear or solutions

imbalance sounds like a miss-spelling or something buried deep in an escrow agreement – 6 billion survivalists confront imbalance as daily norm; epicenter of tremors in New York where the term ground zero takes on new dimensions for those who measure worth by earnings, value by yield, potential by growth and lift

I need/try to get a handle on my center of gravity - I mix a few comments with the collective wisdom of 14,000 minds every morning which is well worth getting up for; once in a while a brilliant breakthrough in communication, some enlightenment – more often the result is a subtle though important pause; one must wonder, with so many smart people since the beginning of discussion on some Greek hilltop many centuries ago, why is the world so out of whack?

or, is it not out of whack at all?

I’m up to discuss that

Mark Kolke
339,400
198.6

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Mark: What a lovely blessing/wish you sent our way. "May the value of you shine through in everything you choose to do." Wow, now that is neat. Blessings on you and your's too this day, week, month, year. MP from Toronto

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You need no more luck than opening up one eye and know you are alive. Life is luck on its own, life is what YOU make of it"T" Here at Home, WT, Calgary

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Hi Mark: I am having huge problems with the yahoo site so please change my Musings to: XXXX I really enjoy my daily dose but have not been getting them so please switch addressees for me, Thank you, JM, Salmon Arm, BC

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And may you be in heaven at least an hour before the devil knows you're dead! (another old Irish blessing.) Too bad it would be if investing in myself and others yielded little or nothing. I am not a religious believer, but I have faith in one Biblical dictum: "Cast your bread upon the waters......" Value is relative, depending on what is being measured, and who is measuring it, EG,Calgary

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you are reaching so many people in a profound way, Mark. Though readers make what they will of it, you are, and have always been, the catalyst. I know you don't do it for us, but it's nice to benefit just the same!, LR, Irvine, CA

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: 1C/34F, charcoal colored tree silhouettes against a pale yellow/blue sky emerged from twilight as we walked to the soccer field and back; two frisky pups were out walking their owners, Gusta somewhat contrite following yesterday’s leash breaking – pace quickened as my ankle seemed able to handle it, as I needed it to be

“For each petal on the shamrock this brings a wish your way. Good health, good luck, and happiness for today and every day.”- Irish blessing

good luck, good management and good times ought to go together I suppose, but so often that is not the case - I’ve had times of plenty and plenty of the opposite . . this day, when the Irish are supposed to be lucky, what’s for the rest of us?

a couple of things happened last week that could, I suppose, be attributed to luck or coincidence – or maybe they were just situations where preparation wanted to meet up with opportunity; I used to think having was more important than giving, that having would make me feel better, that showing what I have would bring what I wanted rushing to my door – spending when I had it and investing in myself showed mixed results, investing in others fared no better – I am at a point in my life where having, getting and proving anything holds only a fraction of the value I perceived at 30

to everyone, both Irish and those who wish they were, may you have a very lucky day, may looking forward be better for you than looking back or wanting to, and the value of you shine through in everything you choose to do

value is what you have left when the worth is spent, it is what remains standing when all other means of support are gone – it is the measure of us, the only measure that really counts

Mark Kolke
339,424
198.4

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


What do you think? Join the discussion - comments are welcomed - please write.

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

DNA research will undoubtedly some day reveal the answers to all those questions, but that is many years in the future, perhaps centuries, since personal feelings and predilections are so complex. For now, studying it from the standpoint of behavioral science is much more rewarding. Indeed, I agree that existentialist reverie and discussion in a relaxing and intimate setting is probably most satisfying, EG, Calgary
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Dear Mark: I would be very pleased if you would send me the daily newsletter. Thank you, DB, Saskatchewan

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Mark’s Musing today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -13C/9F, stiff wind in our face coming back, surprisingly good traction, Gusta found a fresh blanket of snow is a roadmap maze, all tracks, no rabbit

Saturday was a day of great satisfaction and relaxation; last night we saw The Bank Job (much better than the reviews) to cap a day of hangin’ with Carla and PB, dinner with my dad and smiling at my situation; existential discussion, shopping, casual conversation, deep, shallow, deep again; child of mine Carla will always be, but child no more - already far more grounded a woman than I might have reasonably expected or wished for, which swells me with pride, satisfaction and peace of mind

fueled by intention, innovation is ‘new way to do something’ or new way to use a tool – not invention but practical inventiveness; relationships of people, events, ideas and how things connect confound me; perhaps DNA research will one day reveal why some people and ideas connect as others languish, explain myself to me - or yourself to you, so we can all understand how zeal to create magical experience is formed

things that relate and connect to one another, like dominoes tip over, create Rube Goldberg-like chain reactions, completing as if there was some master plan, even when there was no plan at all – not so often with actions as they do with ideas, completing when feelings rest comfortably in appropriate corners of my mind

infectious innovation and creativity infect us when they spread, virus-like; some people get them, some don’t, no rhyme, no reason, no easy explanation; some people respond to invitation, rise to challenge, step over dotted-lines or slip comfortably into new roles – make room for more in any mind

antidote to the ‘could have, would have, should have’ of life - reveling in how exciting it has been and how powerful it yet can be - innovation is all about risking; risking success, risking failure, risking new experience, risking being dissatisfied with what arrives instead of standing still where the far greater risk is dissatisfaction with sameness

innovation is to creativity as pleasure is to satisfaction, as value is to worth – close, yes, but no comparison; early morning solitude, time for quiet reflection, is mostly about being alone, yet alone does not equal lonely

reflecting on experiences past or passed by, on problems solved, on ill-logic of challenges and life itself – as I sip coffee in the dark - I am sitting on a mountainside or walking a beach somewhere, re-hashing some tangent of thought without resolution – with a smile, with pride, satisfaction and peace of mind

Mark Kolke
339,448
197.6

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


What do you think? Join the discussion - comments are welcomed - please write.

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

You can spend a lot of time looking back over your shoulder and second-guessing the decision you have made. I think one of the most sinister traps are the "If I had only..." The current expressions like: get on with it, suck it up, get a life - all of them unfortunately coined by our post-literate society, but actually expressing impatience with anything but the future. It becomes especially hard for people like me with a significant past - at least in terms of minor celebrity - but I have long ago learned to face the reality that they all grew up without me and seem to be surviving. 80th birthday party last night. 80 friends and family. Realized that the difference between family whom you love and who sprung from the union of you and your wife - and friends. I defined friends as people who have let us into their lives. We all go back a long way together but time is not wasted on nostalgia, LS, Toronto

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Hey there Mark: I wish to attend the contest, where do you go next. Watch out for that Z.
"T", WT, Calgary

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Re: intense feelings - Hi Mark, It seems like you're working around a lot of things these days which are making you write about ideas that are close to the actual situations but not the situations directly. It's like putting an object into a gunny sack and trying to guess what it is. Intriguing. My guess is that GH an PB are sorting out next steps and there aresome up in the air feelings. Good for you. Best wishes. It's really blowing here tonight, spring is on the way. PD, Vancouver

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -4C/26F, overcast, light sleet (snowflakes trying to grow up) falling, everything covered by a film - as thick as and looking like a dryer-sheet; Gusta looking every way but up for those honking geese; we had a good stretch around the neighborhood; there is surely a connection between a rash on my scalp and that new shampoo, between my daughter coming through the door last night and my big smile, or between Gusta’s whining - slumped in a lump at the door waiting for Carla’s return from a run

complex connect-the-dots relationships in individual and collective lives bear watching, but no analysts write columns on it Saturday mornings so I’ll take a stab, trying to decipher relationships where none appear to exist

understanding, or illusion of it, is possible when looking in the rear-view mirror to see what we just passed through - I try hard to decipher relationships between events – not to paint a path of what to do next, but to get smart about what just happened; did I choose the most appropriate ones, did I miss the boat on others – did I make a colossal blunder or lay the groundwork for a glorious unfolding? . . will my choices bring a future filled only with joy, absence of pain, a full belly, a full smile, a full mind?

I understand how radio waves and TV signals behave – hundreds, perhaps thousands of them, flying around but if I am not tuned in I miss them all; when I tune in I hear or see only one at a time (males are more developed in this regard – we perfected the technique of rapid channel clicking so as to give us the illusion we are tuned in to many at once)

when I tune in to signals sent me by events, opportunities, friends, families, animals, the outdoors, nature, the weather and the actions of others I am receiving many signals at once (maybe Cisco could invent a router for that) - but what connects wishes, hopes, dreams, ideals, values with adventure, spunk and ideas; does it all happen by accident?

consequences rarely relate logically to plans because incidents, coincidence and opportunity are swirling always; some opportunities came my way this week which I acted on, others I didn’t . . . and I wonder why; writing on an issue or idea or a problem is my way of scribbling on a blackboard – using the brush to swish away chalk in wide swinging motions often – then I can start over and over, looking for a logical plausible result – trying to be tuned in to that which connects us

[I paused before finishing this - fried egg sandwiches needed to be cooked]

now, a day half-planned will soon be half-over so there is not time to waste . . signals to be received, things to watch for . . stay tuned; more important still are the signals we send – we have no idea who will receive them but, like radio and TV stations, no one will if we are not broadcasting; I have nothing sappy to say about ‘sending your message to the world’ or anything spiritual to add on the subject – just a recognition that thoughts tossed out in conversation or over the airwaves have thousands of permutations of consequences just waiting to happen
at this time 5 years ago Carla came to Calgary for a few days – in a conversation about exercising and writing I was smug, arrogant and pushy; that was the impetus for Musings which began on March 21, 2003; I’m still smug, arrogant and pushy but along the way some really interesting and life-altering signals have been sent and received – from a conversation of 2, to a circulation of 8, to an audience of tens of thousands

the lesson is this: when my daughter is around, I have my receiver set to ‘all channels’ because I know there will be interesting conversation; experience has taught me that I don’t get to know in advance which signals will just float by and which ones will alter my path but I do trust that some of them will and I want to see where they lead

Mark Kolke
339,472
198.5

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Ultimately, it is ALL great fun! I, “who cannot even control [my]self should hardly aspire to control the universe.” A Course in Miracles. Congrats on your winning speech! BL, Great Falls, MT

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Re: intense feelings - Hello Mark, I found this Day's Musings quite interesting. I don't know you or your family but found your musings very insightful and I think you really believe in what you wrote. None of us are perfect and if only we would really think before we speak it would solve many problems that speaking rashly creates. I think you were spot on when you said, "I'm sorry and I love you," to your 'dot ' (daughter). Way to go Mark!, B, Regina, Sask

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today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report: -6C/20F, we ventured out cautiously, predictions of significant morning flurries had me nervous about footing but we found bare and dry under a mostly empty sky – unexpected conditions while Gusta was not sure if she saw 14 rabbits or the same rabbit 14 times - unexpected stimulation to be sure

getting what I expect - achieving work-life balance is as likely as a lottery win, possible, but highly improbable on any given day; how then, if I seek a work-life balance that puts a smile on my face, can I plan, do, work, play, live . . with any expectations at all?

consequences can be predicted to some degree: being unprepared rarely produces a winning result, making assumptions is always a wild card, people tend to behave the way they have before if circumstances are the same, things that are dropped often get damaged in some way and, delaying a decision rarely alters the ultimate decision but the delay often alters the outcome significantly

unexpected consequences, unexpected events, unexpected feelings – each arrives unexpected and I am always surprised; beautiful surprises, unmitigated disasters – each arrive under the unexpected label; when I look at the troubles on my plate – I have to ask which ones were unexpected; when I look at the unexpected consequences of events – few could have been predicted; however, the beautiful surprises were all the result of good efforts, well intentioned deeds and genuine interest in the issue, person, project etc. - there is a lesson in that if nothing more than realizing it

I was expecting a client to take a step they said they would – they didn’t (after 28 years I am used to this phenomenon but always perplexed by the unique direction it takes, often far more intriguing than my initial wildest expectations) which often produces a chuckle, once in a while roll-on-the-floor laughter; I was expecting a different response from my daughter in conversation – she didn’t, but when we talked yesterday it was productive and healthy – what I didn’t realize was that she’d not seen my offending e-mail or my apology . . . laughter followed, stubborn genes intact; I was expecting support and hoped for success with a speech I gave in a contest last night against formidable competition – I got it and I did win, but the unexpected consequences were the laughter I never expected; I’d planned it seriously and expected it to produce a serious reaction (I believe it did) but I had no idea it would produce laughter . . or the win

‘Nearly all the best things that came to me in life have been unexpected, unplanned by me.’ – Carl Sandburg

each time I get an unexpected consequence I smile and recognize I should have been expecting it – then time passes and I get another one and I am always surprised; each time I get a surprise, fair or foul, I find that when I try to dissect it there is clear evidence to me there is direct connect between the quality of the effort I put in relative to the quality of the surprise; sometimes I deservedly land on my tush, sometimes a butterfly lands on me

Mark Kolke
339,496
197.4

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


What do you think? Join the discussion - comments are welcomed - please write.

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©2008 MaxComm Communications

Often my good friend; I find you circle those wagons for little reason. You said it; you passed on the DNA you can't take it back. If you know you are stubborn, then why do you get upset when your girls follow in your pattern? Slow the tense emotions down by accepting they are you."T" Here at home, WT, Calgary

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Hello Mark, A good bit of advice to listen to, Google Randy Pausch. He makes sense at every level, MB, Calgary

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Hi Mark, Pls add XXXXXX to your list. Thx., DB, Calgary

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Very cool today Mark. Don’t know how I got on your email. I haven’t read all too often. But today I did and loved what you had to say. The Truman quote is brilliant and dead on…and I am not a parent. Regardless, I appreciated today’s message, MA, Seal Beach, CA

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I enjoy reading your daily journal every day, though i feel frustrated and intrigued that i don't know the columnist or author. Not to the point of gossip but if you could answer 2 questions below that would ease my anxious curiosity. 1/ How long have you been writing? 2/ So you are a commercial realtor? I am planning to visit your TM Single Club next week with a friend, can you kindly advise the time and place? Best, ZN, Calgary

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g'hoppa.......sometimes being stubborn is being tenacious, sometimes it is being obstinate, or sometimes its is hanging in there...either way it may be the quality that gets us through some challenge. b'fly, PB, Calgary

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To subscribe to Mark's Musings daily email distribution, write to mark@markmusing.com
©2008 MaxComm Communications

today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park

walk report:-8C/17F, quiet, early light bathes the sky implying it will be another mild day, Gusta wanted to keep going but my schedule required I cut it short

I find it flattering and daunting - when someone asks me for advice; each time that happens it begs the question of ‘what do I have to give?’

I see clearly when things don’t matter to me, I see clearly when it is ‘someone else’s stuff’, I see clearly when it is someone else’s family, life, problems . .

when I view my own situation, sometimes I can’t find myself with both hands especially when I try to give unsolicited advice to my children; I don’t try it often, I’ve always done it in a way I thought was right but I don’t recall a single time when they thought so

it seems, in my experience, that people ask for advice they usually know the answer already but don’t like it, so asking advice is a way of being magnanimous while, on the other hand, giving unsolicited advice is like feeding cash to an investment gone bad – it hurts a little each time and the hopes of a favorable return are figments of imagination

I passed along many characteristics = I’m happy to have given them a work ethic, pride, compassion, humor, good teeth and empathy for those who cannot help themselves while, to my chagrin, I also passed along my ‘stubborn gene’

the legacy we leave children is not calculated numerically – it isn’t about things - we leave them a set of DNA driven characteristics coupled with experiences we share, good and bad; the legacy we leave is a basket filled with, hopefully, more joys than pain, more laughter than conflict, longer life, better life and a set of skills to help them along their way; the legacy we leave is pride in their successes and our own failure – a failure to be more, to have done better, to undo what cannot be undone

when my children were adolescents I came across a fantastic quote from Harry Truman I used to great advantage and tout as the single best piece of advice I’ve ever encountered on parenting: ‘I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.’

I did, I have, they have; now and then I trip over myself being me, when I forget Harry’s advice and mess things up a bit – so far it seems not to be a fatal but it is best embodied in another of his great quotes: ‘Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.’

To my daughter Krista: I’ll always think I am right and you will think you are right; what matters is not that we are stubborn or that we have a stalemate over something small but rather that we have intense feelings; as for our chat last night and my snot-o-gram e-mail sent earlier this morning, I’m sorry and I love you

Mark Kolke
339,520
197.2

... with your voice, teach in order to learn


What do you think? Join the discussion - comments are welcomed - please write.

To subscribe to Mark's Musings daily email distribution, write to mark@markmusing.com

©2008 MaxComm Communications

It's when relationships fall apart that we come to the realization that all the 'money and things' we have in life have very little value. Life without meaningful relationships is empty. SL, Calgary

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Hi Mark, Do you give advice? I’m having some marital problems and would like your opinion, JC, Houston, TX

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Dear Mark, I haven’t received any Musings for a couple of weeks now. Did I get deleted from the mailing list? Hope everything is OK with you, KS, Netherlands

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So refreshing that you've found your priorities. As Winston Churhill put it, "I have reached the broad, sunny uplands....." I find this daily communication a help in focusing.
EG, Calgary

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