Wednesday, October 31, 2007
not so soon - Wednesday, Oct. 31, 2007
today’s Musing written and published from south Calgary, near Fish Creek Park
-1C/13F (high 10C), calm, dark; golden retriever pulling power is average for a big dog I suppose, but when the right combo of rabbit scent, direction and light breeze arrive, then shoulder ripping are the only words to describe Gusta’s lunges
arranging words on a page – fridge magnet poetry style – seeking the economical combo to convey any meaning at all, guiding principles to accept reality’s coming harshness - life’s value and shortness lost on us when we are young - so much on our minds, on our plates, self-absorbed frisky explorers we were; mid-life arrives - the future sill looks bright, stretched out long, decades in front of us, curves far from view but we know they are out there – we accept that reality we cannot yet see, we know it, thirst for it and certainly accept it; I WILL still embrace life in 30 or 40 years – but maybe I’ll say ‘not so soon’
vulnerable, frail, weak - my dad faces his daily risks from the safety of his hospital bed, surrounded by much medical science stuff and staff - risks beyond my level of comfort or acceptance; HK is improving (he asked me to thank those who have called and written), moved to a regular heart ward, he looks stronger (but not strong) each day; as for me, encountering the business end of a much lauded health care system is very frustrating; not sure about the ultimate lesson will be, but I know I am being taught something
wrapped in a confusing blend of regrets of the past, fear of the future - accepting the inevitable is hard; resisting the stupid, fighting the ridiculous, confronting the bone-headed – easy things I can do, my skills practiced, techniques for railing against the ridiculous or an obstacle is easy, not always real easy, but easy compared to this acceptance thing
accepting the inevitable, things we cannot possibly change; not giving in but at least acknowledging facts, realities that cannot be altered - inevitable that life goes on, that life will end – but not so soon please, not so soon
nothing I can do holds hands of the clock in place, no critique or complaint will fix the unfixable, prevent what cannot be prevented – no tool available to stretch days into weeks or months into years or the next year into ten; not angry as much as I am sad, I am not lost as much as I don’t like this place I’ve found
Mark Kolke
339,812
197.0
What do you think? Join the discussion - your comments are welcomed - please write.
To subscribe to Mark's Musings daily email distribution, write to musing@maxcomm.ca
©2007 MaxComm Communications, all rights reserved.
-1C/13F (high 10C), calm, dark; golden retriever pulling power is average for a big dog I suppose, but when the right combo of rabbit scent, direction and light breeze arrive, then shoulder ripping are the only words to describe Gusta’s lunges
arranging words on a page – fridge magnet poetry style – seeking the economical combo to convey any meaning at all, guiding principles to accept reality’s coming harshness - life’s value and shortness lost on us when we are young - so much on our minds, on our plates, self-absorbed frisky explorers we were; mid-life arrives - the future sill looks bright, stretched out long, decades in front of us, curves far from view but we know they are out there – we accept that reality we cannot yet see, we know it, thirst for it and certainly accept it; I WILL still embrace life in 30 or 40 years – but maybe I’ll say ‘not so soon’
vulnerable, frail, weak - my dad faces his daily risks from the safety of his hospital bed, surrounded by much medical science stuff and staff - risks beyond my level of comfort or acceptance; HK is improving (he asked me to thank those who have called and written), moved to a regular heart ward, he looks stronger (but not strong) each day; as for me, encountering the business end of a much lauded health care system is very frustrating; not sure about the ultimate lesson will be, but I know I am being taught something
wrapped in a confusing blend of regrets of the past, fear of the future - accepting the inevitable is hard; resisting the stupid, fighting the ridiculous, confronting the bone-headed – easy things I can do, my skills practiced, techniques for railing against the ridiculous or an obstacle is easy, not always real easy, but easy compared to this acceptance thing
accepting the inevitable, things we cannot possibly change; not giving in but at least acknowledging facts, realities that cannot be altered - inevitable that life goes on, that life will end – but not so soon please, not so soon
nothing I can do holds hands of the clock in place, no critique or complaint will fix the unfixable, prevent what cannot be prevented – no tool available to stretch days into weeks or months into years or the next year into ten; not angry as much as I am sad, I am not lost as much as I don’t like this place I’ve found
Mark Kolke
339,812
197.0
What do you think? Join the discussion - your comments are welcomed - please write.
To subscribe to Mark's Musings daily email distribution, write to musing@maxcomm.ca
©2007 MaxComm Communications, all rights reserved.
