Musing

+2C/35F, overnight wind now subsided to a steady breeze ; we walked through the park early in the dark, startled by a big poodle coming around a corner – otherwise our walk was uneventful, 18 sleeps till Maui bound, 19 sleeps till I walk my beach – time to set that aside and focus on things to do over the next 18 days!

KP arrived at 9:00 to meet Gusta and go out for our photo-shoot; Gusta was less cooperative than one would like but Kim thinks a few good shots found their way to film while Gusta’s speed and quick movements probably messed many; many thanks Kim for offering to do this . . stay tuned for a great Gusta shot coming soon

I found myself conflicted the other day; someone made comments - I reacted to them as ‘not the way I feel/behave at all’ – that focused my attention to examine my intention

OK, my reaction was excessive knee-jerk in the moment, but I felt this person had a wrong take on me; how could this be? why did it matter? was it the issue or the person?

the assumptions, some of them, were near the truth; not accurate, but close enough - others, in my view, were dead wrong; not wrong, but dead wrong; those assumptions drawn from my writing, my reputation and discussion among mutual friends

if it was someone I scarcely knew, did not care about it any way, then it would not matter at all; but, because this person is a friend I see frequently, someone I am interested in knowing better, because this is a friendship I wish to foster and retain – it seemed to matter a lot at the time, maybe it matters a little less today because I need to accept how people see things, how they see me

I need to recognize and appreciate how others see my motives - how they appear, how they are felt; this, it would seem, is not always as closely aligned with my intention – my assumption debunked

rather than ‘adjusting’ how someone views me, I could adjust me or I could try to adjust their view, or both, or neither

neither

we can spend our lives trying to adjust what we do and how it appears to fit what we want others to see or we can fit ourselves into our own skin to just be the way we are

some people take me my way, others will take me their way

that’s OK with me; my struggles are with me, not them

sometimes that will mean someone I like will not like me for some reason

that’s OK . . because the one I need to keep in focus is me, that is the only way I can useful to myself, to anyone else, to my world

if someone else sees me differently, that is their view – I must respect it if I respect the person, I must respect that view is their reality

it need not be mine, but I need to respect that perspective

I’ll focus on my intention

Mark
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