Musing

10C/50F [27C yesterday broke a record, today will likely shatter another from 1887], very welcome global warming given a chilly couple of weeks in south Calgary; a beautiful morning, Gusta sniffed a miniature poodle to distraction while its young owner too shy to say hello; kids bikes left in the park overnight were still there reminds me of childhood days when a neighbourhood was everyone’s to share & leaving things out & about was not risky

I will not be ‘on a course today’ as work & other commitments meant I had to decline a very kind invitation to fill a slot on his 4-some for golf @ Glen Eagles today . . dwat; thanks Tom . . another time ?

constrained by circumstances, marriages, lifestyles, locations & careers in which they feel locked, I think many people feel stuck or that they follow paths they feel it is necessary to follow; they fail to realize how much freedom to pick & choose & create for themselves they really have; freedom to set their own course as it were - - to navigate their future

Columbus & others set out on extraordinary risky journeys of exploration with faith in themselves, belief in a destination & confidence they could navigate a course, change course as required & return home safely

changing course, plotting a course or departing comfortable harbours is far less risky today but most of us remain comfortably in the harbour unless someone evicts them

how do we coach ourselves, or get coaching/mentoring, to help determine if our perspective is wide enough, if our thinking is expansive enough to see the range of opportunities ?

talking to two friends, both musers, these last few days got me thinking on an issue that is not unique to only a few

these two, diverse/different from one another as any two people I know, use similar language to describe how & why they seek new directions; they are looking to follow a compass, follow a chart or follow someone’s advice & direction, each finding it very difficult to figure out a course of action on their own

I found it strange four years ago, leaving the mother ship of a big company; no longer was there a guy in the corner office to whom I could go for mentorship, guidance, direction or to ask forgiveness when I had forgotten to get permission – come to think of it, that lack of leadership/mentorship was one of several key reasons for my departure – but that is another story for another day

my diverse & valuable mentors/coaches are everywhere; ‘out of the blue’ comments from musers, occasional chats & rare meetings with KT, FD, KK, DB, RS, KC, CB & others; my absent guy in the corner office has been replaced by this hybrid plus this guy in my mirror, by friends who say ‘hey, did you think about this?’ & last but not least, Harry

Harry, gave me the best advice of all a long time ago, many years after his death, the day I read one of his most memorable quotes; a true-ism; from a true man

advice as worthy for my use today as it was many years ago helping me coach my children to take on decision making in their own lives:

‘ I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.’ – Harry Trueman

the tough part, I think, whether young child or middle-aged child, is to describe ‘what we want to do’, then trust ourselves with the choice, trust ourselves to act on the choice

we all have the answers already; we all know what we are good, what we love to do, what gives us joy, what engages our mind, what spurs our energy; so too we all have views deep in our bellies about where we want to live, how we want to work, what kind of lifestyle will give us joy – but often, most of the time actually, most of us prevent our mind from going there by rationalizing that the course we are on, the circumstances we are in, the limitations we feel subject to – that these things cannot be changed

it is simple really

if you are on course, hit ‘em straight, if you are not on course, listen to Harry

Mark

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