Saturday, February 25, 2006
Saturday Feb. 25, 2006 - Year 3, Day 341 - irrevocable experiences
-22C[wind chill –30]/-11F, it started out clear with snow & frost on everything – better than any picture postcard . . our romp past lagoon on un-cleared path was good exercise but coming back with that steady breeze in our face that chilled to the bone boosted our heart rate; now it is completely overcast …hard to tell if it is cloud that rolled in quickly or a blanket of ice fog as it warms up
isn’t it just about pleasure ? this question posed by DB the other day & discussion followed
this date / mate / meet / greet middle aged single scene complexity thing – this meeting, scrutinizing, figuring out compatibility & often mind-numbing challenge of meeting someone we’d like to spend more than a little time with, someone we might just want to become attached to & build twin rocking chairs with . .
the question . . once all the criteria analysis paralysis is aside, is one of ‘isn’t it just about pleasure?’
that would make ‘being without’ a question about the ‘absence of pleasure’
by that I don’t mean the seeking of pleasure as some leftover 60’s version of free love & open relationships – but I mean that the enjoyment of a person, a partner, a friend, a lover . . can just be about taking pleasure from each other, giving of time & effort for the sole purpose of pleasure – both in & out of the bedroom
some people I’ve talked to ponder . . then say ‘sure, you’ve got it’, some say no, it’s more complicated that that’ while others look at me strangely like the very notion of such a discussion makes me a pariah
when I wrote ‘absence of pleasure’ I immediately recalled a movie title; Field & Newman in ‘Absence of Malice’ . . a dramatic story of wishing to do no harm gone wrong
the act of simply pursuing pleasure with a prospective partner / mate / friend is that it is not absent, can never be absent, defies absence . .
it is a present, in the present, for the present & sometimes it is only about the present
whether it is a light touch scarcely leaving a fingerprint - or a deep footprint, we make impressions & affect each other, we have irrevocable experiences that alter our viewpoint, alter our trajectory & sometimes alter our lives in overwhelming ways with resistance vis-à-vis non-resistance playing no real role in that
if people affect you, they do
if they don’t affect you, you aren’t paying attention
this has nothing to do with whether or not you want them to affect you
they boost our heart rate
I’m glad they do . .have a great Saturday !
Mark
isn’t it just about pleasure ? this question posed by DB the other day & discussion followed
this date / mate / meet / greet middle aged single scene complexity thing – this meeting, scrutinizing, figuring out compatibility & often mind-numbing challenge of meeting someone we’d like to spend more than a little time with, someone we might just want to become attached to & build twin rocking chairs with . .
the question . . once all the criteria analysis paralysis is aside, is one of ‘isn’t it just about pleasure?’
that would make ‘being without’ a question about the ‘absence of pleasure’
by that I don’t mean the seeking of pleasure as some leftover 60’s version of free love & open relationships – but I mean that the enjoyment of a person, a partner, a friend, a lover . . can just be about taking pleasure from each other, giving of time & effort for the sole purpose of pleasure – both in & out of the bedroom
some people I’ve talked to ponder . . then say ‘sure, you’ve got it’, some say no, it’s more complicated that that’ while others look at me strangely like the very notion of such a discussion makes me a pariah
when I wrote ‘absence of pleasure’ I immediately recalled a movie title; Field & Newman in ‘Absence of Malice’ . . a dramatic story of wishing to do no harm gone wrong
the act of simply pursuing pleasure with a prospective partner / mate / friend is that it is not absent, can never be absent, defies absence . .
it is a present, in the present, for the present & sometimes it is only about the present
whether it is a light touch scarcely leaving a fingerprint - or a deep footprint, we make impressions & affect each other, we have irrevocable experiences that alter our viewpoint, alter our trajectory & sometimes alter our lives in overwhelming ways with resistance vis-à-vis non-resistance playing no real role in that
if people affect you, they do
if they don’t affect you, you aren’t paying attention
this has nothing to do with whether or not you want them to affect you
they boost our heart rate
I’m glad they do . .have a great Saturday !
Mark
342,608
