Sunday, October 16, 2005
Sunday Oct. 16, 2005 - Year 3, Day 209 - needs to wrestle
shriveled leaves tumble down pavement, Halloween decorations hung by Martha Stewart wannabe’s flap in the crisp north wind, no one else is walking; 6C/47F would imply a nice day, but it’s really ugly & gloomy out there - ugly & gloomy in here too
as I expected, someone took my comment yesterday as advocating a 7 day work week, which was neither my intent or purpose, while I do some work every day, I don’t advocate working all day every day, but then again, my view of work as ‘work’ is probably different than most . . for me it is pleasure & pleasure every day is OK with me
surely chick flick material but rather well done given its painfully slow start, I saw that Shirley Maclain shoe movie ‘In Her Shoes’ last night with AW & a good visit after . . . seems we are both at similar junctures in our romantic lives; currently idle but open for business !
part of me wants to curl up on the couch with a blanket & sleep, part of me wants to run away to a foreign land, part of me wants to ‘figure it all out’, part of me wants to toss it aside as nothing in devil-may-care fashion – writing it off as indigestion to be solved with another cup of coffee & a good BM or a good roll in the hay . . or both, but alas only coffee & porcelain & a good book are my companions today
I struggle some mornings, including this one for an answer to something – not finding one, generating more questions instead – then struggling more to reduce this to keystrokes if words on a page could somehow describe this wrestling with needs – these needs to wrestle
is it mid-life stuff, lonely stuff, simple stuff . . or not stuff at all ?
Q. how many times have I felt like this . . in this place . . in this state of mind ?
A. many
sometimes it produces brilliance & joy with high energy output, but not before I turn & turn & stir & muddle in this weird space a while - I wonder if others do this too ?
surely this is not so unique that it is not solvable with a good sleep, a good meal or a good book on the subject or, maybe . . just maybe there is no problem to solve
I’m no more or less normal than the next person with time on their hands to think, too much time sometimes, or whose brain races too fast on some tangent
then comic relief arrived / intervenes . . as Gusta entertains, chasing her tail . . barking to invite play – she’s feeling lots better today
I’m off to lunch with my dad soon & Gusta needs to wrestle . . .
Mark
342,656
as I expected, someone took my comment yesterday as advocating a 7 day work week, which was neither my intent or purpose, while I do some work every day, I don’t advocate working all day every day, but then again, my view of work as ‘work’ is probably different than most . . for me it is pleasure & pleasure every day is OK with me
surely chick flick material but rather well done given its painfully slow start, I saw that Shirley Maclain shoe movie ‘In Her Shoes’ last night with AW & a good visit after . . . seems we are both at similar junctures in our romantic lives; currently idle but open for business !
part of me wants to curl up on the couch with a blanket & sleep, part of me wants to run away to a foreign land, part of me wants to ‘figure it all out’, part of me wants to toss it aside as nothing in devil-may-care fashion – writing it off as indigestion to be solved with another cup of coffee & a good BM or a good roll in the hay . . or both, but alas only coffee & porcelain & a good book are my companions today
I struggle some mornings, including this one for an answer to something – not finding one, generating more questions instead – then struggling more to reduce this to keystrokes if words on a page could somehow describe this wrestling with needs – these needs to wrestle
is it mid-life stuff, lonely stuff, simple stuff . . or not stuff at all ?
Q. how many times have I felt like this . . in this place . . in this state of mind ?
A. many
sometimes it produces brilliance & joy with high energy output, but not before I turn & turn & stir & muddle in this weird space a while - I wonder if others do this too ?
surely this is not so unique that it is not solvable with a good sleep, a good meal or a good book on the subject or, maybe . . just maybe there is no problem to solve
I’m no more or less normal than the next person with time on their hands to think, too much time sometimes, or whose brain races too fast on some tangent
then comic relief arrived / intervenes . . as Gusta entertains, chasing her tail . . barking to invite play – she’s feeling lots better today
I’m off to lunch with my dad soon & Gusta needs to wrestle . . .
Mark
342,656
