Musing

Hey there, who is sending me these emails... rather interesting but unaware of where you are or what this is all about. Please send me a personal message so I am kept in the loop and understand what is going on, from where. Thank you!, RA

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Hey Mark, I was widowed in Oct/03 and during these past 18 months or so, I've been dealing with "going with the flood" not trying to push the river... and adjusting to the change in my landscape. I haven't had time to read your blogs for a few weeks and also am a bit of a dinosaur technology-wise.. so this "old" form of musing caused me to tune in and "voila" you hit on the exact topic that I've been musing over these past few days especially as I've "finally" begun to come to terms with my new reality. Thanks..for your always interesting and intimate musings., SM

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Hi Mark; Yes! Your insight "I often kid myself with use of the words new, change & shift – they let me maintain an illusion of change when in fact I am a creature of habit doing most things the same old way, living my life the same old way" can be terribly important. Why is it so hard to admit to ourselves the reality that sometimes personal growth can be obtained in ways that don't hurt others so badly and that superficial changes might not be needed to achieve real change. Who says that "stepping out of the box" is so important that so many spend so much energy complaining about the superficial changes they have made, to prove that they have "stepped out of the box". On a different tack, a lot of pain in parent teen relationships comes because teens pre-define their parent's lives as "in the box" and then pre-judge that "box" to have no value. Sometimes you hear adults doing the same thing, disparaging those that they love . Some teens and young adults seem to think that if they do something that hurts or offends their parents, then they have proven their adulthood, but often they have just met someone else's expectations rather than meeting what they think their parent's expectations are. Insights like the one I copies from your email Mark, are rare, and yet they could be honestly taught. LHE

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Hi Mark, just a quick word to NB. Your poet is Dylan Thomas. "Do not go gentle ... " was inspired by his father's death. Read "The force that through the green fuse drives the flower" to energise you for the battle against the inevitable passage of time. And Mark, as for things disappearing never to return. What happened to the British summer? Global warming has turned this place into a steaming, humid grapevine-clad Eden. I enjoy it while I can because once the glaciers and outer rim of the arctic ice cap have melted, my region will be underwater.Going with the flood is no metaphor! xx Shelagh, SK