Musing

Mark, I would like to share with 'VD' on her sorrow and search if I may? VD, I have been in a similar place that you are now, at 29 I lost my husband, father of my two young children and thought my world had ended. After 12 years together, I was alone even though I was lucky enough to have two wonderful little children, I was alone. Frightened, single and still a woman that wanted and felt I really needed a man to hold and comfort me, someone to share the rest of my life with me. I searched and held on to some false relationships, I was young and thought it was what I wanted, needed. Finally, I found that I needed me first; I needed to find the new me without a man at my side but it took many years and many experiences good and bad to learn that. As I have matured, I have been through the 'you don't know me' 'I don't want you to know me' stages, but some men really do want to know who you are and some only want to know your body or your bank account. But give yourself some credit to know you will make it through and you will be stronger and wiser. For all the people you meet will teach you something and those that love you now, will love you tomorrow too. Hang in there. If you remain who you were yesterday, you will stop moving and growing, enjoy your memories but don't wallow in them, take each day as a gift, smile as you rise and thank yourself for all the experience of yesterdays and get on with today. It has been 31 years now for me and not a week goes by where I do not think of what I lost so long ago. Not a day goes by that I am not thankful for the day that past and the love that was mine, the friendships that are found and the tomorrows I will see, maybe alone butnot forever, there is someone else out there I am sure of it. Like you, I am still afraid of finding I have been a fool (again) when it comes to love, but you have to give it a chance, give yourself thetime but please don’t give of your wealth, it is not real love if you have to pay for it. (That is experience talking and another story of why I am single and working so hard these days), js